i’ve been called a racist/rude from doing it but i swear i just feel uncomfortable with those im not close with. i mostly avoid skin contact/sitting beside them/moving away when they sit next me. i avoid all sorts of strangers so i don’t think it makes me a racist.

9 comments

  1. Its cool as long as your not rude/obvious about it. Everyone has their own person predispositions, but like if your showing disgust for blacks for example your being racist.

  3. I get called rude and racist too, behind my back. Meanwhile I’m just trying to exist with the least amount of anxiety possible.

  4. I do this too, I’ve never been called out on it before, but I always self isolate. I guess subconsciously it is my form of taking the path of least resistance / the easiest / most comfortable route.

    When people talk to me I often just smile and nod or say something short like “haha yeah.” and it normally ends the conversation there unless they are super extraverted. The thing is **I** don’t want the conversation to be over its my subconscious that does. I wish more people would talk to me and I wouldn’t just blow them off and come off as rude, pretentious, or aloof or however people perceive me.

  6. From your accounting of things this sounds like someone is abusing you and invading your boundaries. No one is entitled to your personal space much less physical touch regardless of who they are.

    AFAIK the best way to enforce a boundary politely is the phrase “I prefer”. E.g. “I prefer that people don’t sit directly next to me”, or “I prefer that you don’t touch me” etc.

  7. I’m hypersensitive to touch, so random people(or things! like a bag) touching me is a no no. People need to mind their own business.

  8. There’s a lot here. One question to ask is: do you in such situations also want to not avoid people? Or you’re completely happy with keeping you distance and not engaging.

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