I don’t understand why no one wants to be friends with me the only people who seem to be willing to talk to me want to date me which I have no interest in at the moment (2 year celibacy going strong). It’s also confusing to me whenever I do find a slight connection with someone nothing comes out of it but they’re the ones to approach me first (for example they would ask for my Instagram but then ignore me when I try and make plans to hang out). I know there’s nothing I’m doing wrong as I always make the conscious effort to be a good person and I’m fun to be around with and I don’t feel like I come across as being desperate. I just feel like nowadays it’s easier to find a date than make friends.
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Dude your kinda right I’m gonna through a similar thing. But for me it’s any time I try to make friends with girls they always end up liking me if not telling me it’s really obvious. Sometimes I like them too but it’s really hard to be friends with the opposite sex sometimes so I would recommend you look for friends of the same sex as it’s much easier to stay friends that way.
Sorry to hear that u/eatmybussybitch
In what way do you ask them to hang out or try to make plans? Usually it’s much easier to casually bring it up when you’re already hanging out, in person. Sending someone you don’t know very well a text message or something is nerve-wracking imo. I mean, it sounds like catch-22, but who are you trying to become friends with and how do you meet them?
Like, for example, I moved back from living abroad in January and that’s also when we started to have on-campus classes again, so I wanted to get to know more people after such a long time staying at home and then being away for a bit. So I just made an effort to be at my campus and then people who take the same class as I started showing up. I asked to sit a the same table as one of them because all other spots were full, we started chatting about this assignment, I continued to show up every day, the other people did the same, it became routine and at the end of the week one girl asked if anyone would go want to go out for a beer, most people were up for it, we did and now we’re a group of casual friends who have dinner with each other every other week or so.
So, if you have something in common, like studying together or working together, then be present, and slowly start to make conversation with them, like asking about hobbies and their home town and when you see something they like and that you could do together you can just casually sneak it into the conversation. It usually feels more casual and like the stakes are lower that way, I mean if you both like a band, for example, you can go to a show because you both enjoy the music and then also become friends as a by-product. Usually, people want to go and do activities together if they already like the activity, so I’ve never really had anyone say no. And if you talk to them in person they’re not going to ignore you
Sorry if this was long eheh i’m horrible at keeping things short