This has happened to me (26F) with múltiple sexual partners: sometimes, after doing some sexy stuff or the while deed, their penis won’t stay hard, even if they want to go for more.
In some cases, we won’t even get to having intercourse and even though we both want it, it’s like they become nervous all of a sudden and I don’t understand why, in that moment and given the circunstancias.
Men, what are some possible explanations?
4 comments
Anxiety is a common culprit, yes, especially if they’re inexperienced or haven’t done anything for a while. That could be worrying about reaching orgasm too quickly, or worrying about making it enjoyable for you, or anything along those lines. In general though, at least from my perspective, nerves are usually to do with your perception of them and how that could potentially change. It’s very possible that they’re worrying about either embarrassing themselves (in their eyes or yours) or disappointing you.
It’s also possible that some of them had other stuff going on in their lives that was in the back of their minds; or maybe some had masturbated not too long before; or maybe some had already stayed hard for a long time before it started to fade. Perhaps their dick just didn’t want to cooperate that day – that happens too.
Also, not everyone can go for multiple rounds in a row. I feel like it’s probably more common for younger guys to be able to do that, but still, it’s not everyone.
In short though, there are so many explanations that there’s probably no way to know unless the guy in question tells you.
That’s normal. Just because a guy is horny doesn’t mean he will be hard. Also just because a guy is hard it doesn’t always mean he’s horny (I get random boners). Anxiety plays a factor because there are a lot expectations for all of us about sex. Some guys can go for multiple rounds, some cannot. I stay hard for one round but can’t do a second, I can go a bit for her but my hardness drops off. I’m average/high libido and maybe that is a factor in hard erections. Blood makes it hard, so a healthy heart and cardio exercises are very important. Another problem guys have is premature ejac.
Are you drunk while having these encounters?
Typically, in early sexual encounters with new partners, men will have 3 anxiety related responses. These are often subconscious, but some guys will think themselves into it by worrying about performance. They might orgasm too quickly, take too long, or lose erections. They often reinforce these problems by worrying more and ending the sexual encounter (so they can ruminate and worry even more).