Am I being a prude for not wanting it, or for not trying? I am inexperienced with sex. My FWB says it is normal part of sex for the girl to taste/ take his cum in the mouth but I have never been comfortable about it when he asks me. Do I just need to relax more around the idea and be more open minded? Is it really that common in sex?
42 comments
If you’re not excited by it, don’t do it. Simple as that. And that goes for *anything* in sex.
If you’re not into something, you don’t have to do it, regardless of what’s “normal” or not.
That being said, what I have found that what I THINK I’m going to be into is often pretty vastly different from what I am into.
If you decide to give it a try some time, tell him to stop asking and just wait and see for if it feels like a good time to try.
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Sex is for both or you. It’s important to not do anything you don’t want to do. It’s okay for him to ask, and equally okay for you to say no you’re not comfortable with doing that.
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Two things can be true at once about taking semen into your mouth and/or swallowing:
You’re not into it *and* it’s common
Just because one is true doesn’t negate the other.
Personally, I’m of the mind that “if you haven’t tried a sex act and your partner is interested in trying it then it’s worth trying.” Ruling something out because of inexperience would mean that we’d never try anything new.
In the grand scheme of things, this is pretty normal but I want to stress: that doesn’t obligate you to try it if you’re really fundamentally against it.
I’d simply question if your attitude towards this — since you say you haven’t tried it before — is based around some kind of sex aversion rooted in, for example, a sex-negative upbringing or a general aversion to bodily fluids, etc.
Also, while this shouldn’t be transactional, does he go down on you?
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For most guys it’s an anticlimax to not cum in your mouth while getting a blowjob.. you can imagine they are enjoying the feeling of your mouth, the wetness, the warmth, the pressure, etc and when they’re almost coming everything changes, from the lack of warmth to the different pressure etc it’s an anticlimax..
I know it sounds gross at first, but if you tell him to let you know exactly when he’s cumming, stick your tongue over or very close to the head so that you stop the cum from shooting to the back of your throat, or you can lift the back of your tongue to block your throat, once he’s done go spit it out.
Having said that, if it sounds absolutely disgusting to you and you are not willing to or comfortable trying that, *don’t do it*
Grrrr! It’s not compulsory. Nothing in sex is compulsory. It’s great to have a blow job to completion but that’s up to you, not him. Next stage, if you do let him cum, it’s also up to you whether you spit or swallow.
I wonder why some things like this even get posted. You should know that if you don’t want to do something you just say no. Why are you asking for the consensus of other people that have nothing to do with you? Tell him you ain’t fucking doing it and that’s it. If you don’t like it fuck fuck em
It’s not common May be in porn so if it’s not your thing he should be understanding
You dont need to do anything you don’t want to. But he has a right to find a different FWB if it’s something that’s important to him.
There’s lots of things I refuse to do. I simply don’t date men that like those things.
Doesn’t matter if you are a prude or not. You don’t want to do it. You are fwb you don’t owe him anything.
Tell him guys usually lick their cum off your boobs after sex and he should too. Let us know his response.
It’s fine to not be into it. It’s relatively common – I’d say roughly 10% of people in my experience are uncomfortable with cum in their mouth.
Fwiw, going the other way those juices are *everywhere*
I think it’s fairly common to have aversions to fluids, especially until you get used to it. I certainly had/have the same problem at times. What helped me was doing it in the shower. Everything feels cleaner, the water can help thin out fluids and if need be, you should also be able to discreetly spit/rinse without it being very obvious or awkward.
I’d say it’s pretty common but you don’t have to feel like you have to do it. Try to think of it as YOU want to do it, not him wanting you to. Take the power and make it your mission to get him to cum in your mouth. Just hold it in there as he finishes and either swallow it quickly or spit it out. You might feel empowered having so much control over his pleasure. And since he will love it, it will most likely make you feel good too.
He may be wanting to finish with him still in your mouth, which is an intense feeling, so suggest a condom bj. He still gets to and you have that barrier.
If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it, simple as that
I love cum. All over my body. I hate it in my mouth. It’s a hard line for me. I’ve tried it. I don’t like it. I won’t do it. Any one who pressures me to do it, I don’t sleep with.
Be open to new things, but if you don’t like it that’s totally okay. But there are so many things I didn’t know I love until I tried them.
It’s worth trying anything once as long as it won’t hurt you.
I think it’s common and do this all the time with my husband and I love it with him! But if you don’t like it, you don’t like it. If you want to try it, go for it but don’t do it if you don’t want to.
My swallows it no problem. Even professed to liking it. Whatever floats your boat man
Never know until you try it, but that’s just me.
“Normal” is a definition from your bf and it doesn’t mean that it has to be normal for you.
Honestly I like it too, my wife not. Our middle way is next to the typical creampie that I cum on her body.
It’s hot imo
But if you aren’t comfortable doing it he needs to respect that
I was really disgusted by the thought before I tried it once. Then I realized it wasn’t bad and it was hot how much he was into it and how good he felt. Something I do for him, though it doesn’t do much for me. It is exceedingly common to have them finish in your mouth.
If you aren’t comfortable you don’t have to do it. But I will say almost everything was weird or gross to me before I tried it and now I am like helllll yeah. But my motto is try anything twice lmao.
I am married and I don’t like it either so I don’t do it. He either accepts that you don’t want to do it and just doesn’t ask you again or he can find somebody else. Find people that respect your no’s and boundaries.
I would tell him thats something you only want to do with a boyfriend not a fwb. You cant give them everything.
You are not wrong for disliking any sex act. It’s just how you feel. That’s fine. He’s wrong for not taking the no and moving on to something you both want.
I hate cum in my mouth, texture is disgusting and vile, makes me want to throw up, dont care whose it is. Dont do it if you’re not comfortable
most dudes jizz taste like warm, raw oysters. i wouldn’t want it in my mouth either. if you aren’t comfortable with trying it than it’s off the table, no reason to feel bad
Billions of other women have swallowed cum before. You’ll be fine.
It you are having so much problem doing things during sex, means that you arent flying. And this means that your BF Isnt fucking fine. So the rule Is: if you dont feel doing something, probably both of you arent sex compatibile.
Girl the thing is you aren’t in a committed relationship. You do not have to push your boundaries for this, he can go elsewhere.
I have had some sexual trauma and I haven’t felt comfortable with even giving blow jobs at all the past couple of years. I was talking to my FWB about me not giving bjs and I said if we were in a committed relationship (which is something we both do not want) I would be more willing to try and push my boundaries as he can’t go elsewhere.
So like many others have mentioned, if its not something you’re comfortable with, you’re very much entitled to say no and have him respect that decision. I’m sure you wouldn’t push him to do something he wouldn’t do, so it’s exactly the same situation. As for feeling wrong, no it’s not wrong at all, we’ve all said no to something before, be it sex with someone or a specific act with someone, and again there’s nothing wrong with you for saying that, we all have things we like and dislike, that’s totally normal. And to answer your question on whether it’s normal, for some women yes it’s quite normal, in fact it’s something I regularly do with my partner and he enjoys it very much, it’s a closeness thing, it’s me being accepting of all of him, and on top of that, it makes him be quite vocal which I love and makes me feel sexier.
What I would say is, if you’re curious and OK to try it, there’s no harm provided you trust him, but only if you’re OK with it, otherwise suggest an alternative way he could finish, and see if that’s something he’d like just as much and that you enjoy too. Best of luck and hope it all works out.
First of all you shouldn’t have to feel forced to do anything you don’t want to do. If it’s something you are simply not comfortable doing they should be able to respect your boundaries.
Now, as someone who has given a bj and had them finish in my mouth, it’s not a big deal to me. I think for them it’s like if they were having sex and finished inside the vagina vs. pulling out. It’s a nice feeling to have the sucking and stroking continue through the orgasm. Him saying it’s normal to taste the other person is either about domination or intimacy. The fact that you made them cum with your mouth and hold it/swallow it, it’s either making him feel masculine that he got you to do it or you are showing how much you love him by doing something so intimate for him. The most unpleasurable part for me is the taste. It can depend on the guy and what their diet is as to how bad it tastes, but in my experience it always tastes bad. I always brush my teeth after to get it out my mouth. But as long as the penis is washed I don’t mind it if it makes him happy.
Does he go down on you in a similar fashion? Would he be willing to reciprocate the act he’s insisting you perform for him? I’m of the mind that if I’m not willing to do something for/to my partner then I’m not going to expect them to do similar for me.
offer him to collect his cum in your hands and pour it into his mouth.
No it’s real simple, if you don’t want to do something you don’t have to…you don’t even need a reason, if he don’t like it he can fuck off…it’s really just that simple. A line I use a lot in life, not just sex related but when someone wants me to do anything I don’t want to do I will say no…if they ask why, I say “because I don’t want to, and that’s the only reason I need”
Do what is comfortable I have never had a women who did it. I can’t comment if it is common but it certainly not for me.
As someone who swallows every time, if you’re not comfortable with it then don’t do it.
The only reason I started swallowing was because I was giving this one guy head and I had only been blowing him for like a minute and he unexpectantly blew his load in my mouth, and it was my first time ever having cum in my mouth, didn’t mind the taste.
Then I started to notice a pattern it happened with every guy whether it was 2 mins 5 mins or 10 mins they were gonna cum in my mouth. EVERY TIME. But I didn’t mind it because i’m a pleaser and it was hot to know I can make a guy cum in no more than 10 minutes. With head only.
It’s Amazing for you!I love the taste,But it’s only what you’re comfortable with, Hon..