For the past few weeks my ex boyfriend started getting frustrated and taking it out on me. I voiced my concerns to him, and he wasn’t willing to change and better himself for me. We also talked about how I don’t initiate sex enough and that makes him feel rejected. At the end of the conversation we decided we should break up. The next day he texted me and said he never felt a spark with me and just felt “blank” when he was with me. I felt as though he might have been trying to hurt me. He would always tell me how amazing I was, how much he liked being around me, and he would always cling to me when I was with him in a group. I can’t tell if he was being honest, or just trying to hurt me because he felt hurt by the breakup. What do you think? I don’t think our connection was magical, but we always tried to look our best for eachother, would cling to eachother in a room full of people, would have long, meaningful conversations, and the sex was amazing for both of us. I feel extremely hurt.
TLDR; My ex told me he didn’t feel sparks with me after we decided to break up because of sex incompatibilities and his anger. Was he trying to hurt me?
8 comments
There was absolutely zero reason for him to text you *the next day* to tell you this. So clearly, he googled “10 things you can say to hurt your ex’s feelings” and came up with this.
Poorly played. Feel free to care less about his motivations.
What a 31-year-old loser. Forget about him instantly. I’m petty, so I’d respond something like, “Same, hope we both find it.”
You’ll never know for sure what the truth is. He will never be able to tell you, even if he wanted to. He almost certainly lacks that self-awarness.
But you can be certain the only reason he said it, when and how he said it, was because he wanted to hurt you. He wanted to knock you down a peg. He cannot handle rejection. He had to find a story to tell himself where, actually, *he dumped you*.
His ego couldn’t take it. He needed to feel big and powerful again, by hurting you.
End contact. He lashed out once to hurt you, and defend his own bruised ego. He’ll do it again. Don’t leave him the opening. Let him have his nasty little story. You cannot change it, but that doesn’t make it true. Be glad to be rid of him.
He’s a jerk and trying to hurt you. Don’t reply to him any further. He’s done
Yeah, he was trying to hurt you. I wouldn’t even dignify him with an answer. Just block and move on. I know it’s hard, but what he’s doing isn’t communication. He feels hurt probably and wants you to be hurt with him. Fuck that, you broke up, you need to look forward.
Don’t reply, or reply with “lol”. He’s trying to hurt you- hurt people hurt people.
Buy a taser and give him bout 10000 volts. As he convulses on the ground ask him if he feels sparks now?
What do you care what he says? He is your past not your future. Worry about the future – the past can’t be changed – but the future can.
See it’s all about perspective
>trying to hurt me
Ofc he was.
>feel extremely hurt.
Seems mission accomplished. Block him.