I’m four months into a new role and my boss’s kids (22M and 30F) are making my life miserable. They both were splitting the responsibilities of my role before the company decided to hire somebody full-time. Most of my time thus far has been spent fixing their mistakes.
They both talk to me like I’m a dumbass. They question my business decisions on a daily basis. I actually had the son follow me around during one of my big projects telling me “If you f\*ck this up, my dad is going to be pissed”. Then he went behind my back to talk to a subcontractor I hired to get “inside scoop” on details of the project and then confronted me about some of my decisions and basically called me a liar because my story didn’t match his…? He has a key to my office and will go in multiple times a day when I’m not there. He has even signed into my computer. I don’t see a need for either of them to have access to my office. I don’t care if they’re the boss’s kids.
The daughter does not do her job and pawns off tasks to me and then speaks to me as if she’s my boss. Her dad has had me do things when she has dropped the ball and told me she’s not great at following through. He told us to work on a project yesterday (that clearly falls in her wheelhouse) for a big proposal next week and she was a no-show. I worked for 10 hours on it yesterday and am still working on it this weekend to get it done for the deadline. She did end up calling me right before the end of the work day to remind me it’s due Monday and to “send it to her over the weekend so she can look at it.” They knew this was an upcoming project TWO WEEKS AGO and didn’t tell me about it until two days ago. I feel like she did it on purpose.
When I told her dad that this particular project seemed to fall in her wheelhouse, he got pissy with me and told me I was wrong and it’s a group effort.
We are down 50% in sales for this month alone because she is responsible for our high-profile clientele and she hasn’t been doing her job. You would think she would be more efficient at her job now that I’m here and took some of her previous responsibilities away.
She left me stranded at my first work event, causing me to work it alone. I sent her multiple texts after it ended to come get me, ended up having to walk half a mile toting some of our supplies before somebody picked me up to bring me to my car. She came riding by on the shuttle cart when I was still there loading the big stuff by myself and was so wasted, she urinated in the flower bed on the side of the building while people were milling about. Then she tried to gaslight me at work the following week when word got out that I was pissed and tried to convince me she HAD responded to my texts.
I can’t tell them to f\*ck off because they are the boss’s kids and that was my first go-to.
I am only here to save money for a start-up. I gave myself a deadline of October to have the money saved, but I’m not going to make it until then at this rate. There have been other things go on prior to my hiring that were brought to my boss and he didn’t do anything and those “whistleblowers” now have targets on their backs.
Do I try to “fix” the issue, and if so how? If I talk to him, it could backfire and I could become the “bad guy.”
Or should I just call it quits? If I do quit, should I unleash in my exit interview because he’s going to want to know…? The last time somebody quit after only a few months, he apparently went on a screaming rampage. There are other things going on within the organization as well that I’m not fond of. This isn’t the only issue, but it is the biggest.
***TLDR;*** Bosses kids who used to do my job are making my life a living hell to the point that I break out in stress-induced hives every day and want to quit. Do I tell my boss to try to “fix” the issue? I feel like telling the boss might do more harm than good. Do I quit? If I quit, do I tell him why? My plan B is to start my own business and I took this job with the intent to save up for that point. I had given myself a deadline of October but IDK if I can last that long.
8 comments
Talk to the boss, tell him that as the situation stands you’re unable to do your job. If he won’t fix the situation, time to move on.
I’ve been in a similar situation. I’d give it one more try to let the boss know your stance. Set firm boundaries, and then give it a few weeks. The next time it happens you may need to give notice. With 5-6 months to go I’m sure you can pick something else up to stay on track for the funds you’re raising. It took me almost 6 months to undo the damage I got for working in the similar toxic place. Places like this end up costing us so much more than tome and money. It’s never worth it. Good luck
Please get off this flaming toboggan careening downhill.
If you want to tell your boss, I’d do it in an email after you find a new job that you didn’t get using him a reference.
This family is like the evil version of the Roses. Get as far away from them as possible as soon as possible.
Stupid children of boss are the worst, I suggest you two things
1. You could do most part on the project, go your boss desk and say “this is the project, i did this all and now i need to your kids to finish it/polish it”, let your boss know that you are doing your part in a passive agressive way. Ask your boss to check their job
2. If you really dont want to work there anymore, keep sending resumes, when you finally find a place to work, quit and you wont need to take money from your savings.
Start job-hunting. If prospective employers ask why you are changing jobs so soon, tell them that it’s a family business that is in transition between generations and your role has become too undefined and redundant, so you have no room to grow. Get a new gig asap and get out. Don’t bother unleashing at an exit interview. Say, “thank you for the opportunity, I wish you the best” and get out.
So, if this were me, I’d be job hunting. The second I have an offer lined up, I’d schedule a meeting with the boss, lay out (professionally and calmly, like a presentation to client) all of the problems, and how you want them fixed. End with a deadline. If these issues are not fixed within 24 hours, I will hand you my immediate resignation. Then follow through. You want a job offer already lined up because it’s very probable that this will go south, and you don’t need current boss sabotaging your efforts to find another job, nor any bad blood that might affect your interviews for the new job. There is risk in this, but it sounds like you are a scapegoat and a whipping post right now. It’s not a situation that you want to be in, and daddy-boss needs to learn that his kids are the reason his business is in such poop shape, and no one is going to put up with this.
Definitely talk to your boss. Ask Mr. Boss what are his kids’ roles in the company. Are they your supervisors or co-workers? What are their duties? Is everything done as a team (like he indicated with the daughter)? Or are there tasks that are clearly his kids’ responsibilities and ones that are yours? And lastly ask how much authority you have in giving the kids feedback, like can you tell the daughter to tell you about projects at the beginning so you’re not overwhelmed later on, or tell the son to stop having conversations with contractors without letting everyone else on the team know?
If the boss basically says his kids can do no wrong and is treating them more like family than employees, then you need to leave the company. If he says they should be treated like employees first and family second, then ask him if he, you, and the daughter/son could have meetings to discuss your roles.
Start applying to other places. You can postpone your goal of October and adjust your timeline. But if you stay, you won’t make progress in this job. It’s going to crash and you’re going to be the one screwed, cos they still are the babies. It’s better to leave for a better option that’s stable and raise your money slower than to be in this stress for longer.
Your boss can go on rampages all he wants. You’re just an employee and one who gets sabotaged apparently. That’s his problem to solve.