i’ve seen many posts and have talked to many friends about this and it’s 50/50 where some say not having sex often makes a relationship dead and causes breakups and some say it doesn’t . i’m just curious on if it does or doesn’t ? ( no this isn’t about me )

5 comments

  1. It’s going to depend on the people in the relationship and how important sex is to them. Some people are fine in relationships with infrequent sex, while others can’t bear it.

  2. I have not had sex for over 2 years within my 2.5 year relationship. It’s not because I dont want sex, it’s due to other reasons. It’s definitely frustrating, but it’s understandable why there is no sex in our relationship. As long as we keep working towards having sex in the future or come up with a different solution it’s not gonna become a deal breaker. So it really just depends on the 2 people within the relationship.

  3. The issue is not about just having more sex or not.

    The issue is about sexual compatibility. Sexual compatibility leads to intimacy, and it is the intimacy that keeps the relationship.

    Notice that I say “sexual compatibility” because a low libido person may “just have” more sex with a high libido partner in hopes of keeping the relationships but sooner or later this will lead to resentment setting in and higher chances of the relationships failing.

    On the other hand a high libido person may go along with a low libido partner’s lack of desire for more sex but only to get frustrated and often leading to cheating or relationship failing.

    Ideally with sexual compatibility, a high libido will match with a high libido and in this case more sex will make their relationship stronger.

    On the other hand a low libido will also match with a low libido and less sex won’t affect their relationship.

    it also follows that average libido will match with average libido and their average (50/50) encounters will keep their relationship.

    The keyword here is not sex but intimacy, you just need the right dose of intimacy to keep the relationship going.

  4. Sexual neglect can, and usually does, erode and then break a relationship, yes.

    The only real exception is if everyone involved realizes that they were asexual.

  5. It broke one of mine.

    The lack of sex will slowly drive a HL person crazy. But far worse is the constant rejection and feeling undesired.

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