I’ve been paying for my “ex’s” son’s (12) phone. I see him on and off, he used to spend two or three nights a month here, but in the seven years prior I’d have him 3-4 nights a week. He’s moved on, I’m still attached.
He had a super old iPhone for years which died, so I bought him a refurbished iPhone 12 at Christmas time (though he thinks his grandmother bought it for him).
His phone plan is specifically for kids with content, limited contacts and filter restrictions, but he’s figured out loopholes and ways around them (WhatsApp/Snapchat).
About six months ago he started down a bad path, kicked out of school, many detentions, just a history of not doing the right thing. He’s also way behind academically so I told him the only way I’d continue to pay for his phone was if he a) deleted the offending apps, b) respected the content restrictions and c) wrote two “book reports” a month for me.
He’s failed all three terms (apps have been reinstalled and he’s not reading at all – let alone delivering book reports) and last month managed to ring up $500 in international calls. I’m concerned about his device usage and have no access to the phone to monitor behavior.
So two weeks ago I told him, his grandmother and his father that I was no longer comfortable paying his phone bill (behavioral issues first and foremost) and that his service would end at the end of the current billing cycle (tomorrow). In those two weeks they haven’t switched the phone to another plan. The child has not spoken to me since I delivered the breach of contract news, though he initially apologized and asked me to reconsider.
So my question, I’d really rather not talk to anyone of them because they will guilt me into continuing service with promises to switch him soon and things are incredibly complicated with his father right now.
Am I obligated to remind them about end of service? Or can we all just go about our own lives?
TLDR I’m ending a child’s free phone for breach of contract and irresponsible behavior. All adults in his life are aware but have not taken action to maintain his service. Do I need to send reminder before the phone is shut off (tomorrow)?
6 comments
You are not obligated. Them having to deal with the consequences of their irresponsibility will be educational for them. They were informed, you do not need to do more.
End it and block all of them. I’m sorry you still care for him, but it’s time to let it all go. They are all just taking advantage, and while I’m aware he’s a kid, he’s *their* kid, and they can pay for his nonsense from now on.
Just end it.
Is this your child? If not, you’ve been taken complete advantage of.
It’s probably best to cut ties, it sucks to see someone you care about wind up in this position but there really isn’t anything you can do about it. Let his parents deal with it
You gave him plenty of notice already. You told him what he needed to do for the service to continue, and he didn’t do those things. So in terms of communicating about this specific thing, you’ve already done it.
Sounds like he’s going through a lot. Poor kid. But there are adults taking care of him, and who can get him a phone if he needs one.
Just shut it down and make sure the contract ends. You don’t want this junk on your credit.