I’m going to be 20 this summer and I only recently realised how awesome it would be to feel that you belong to a bigger community.

I’m (M) a moderately confident fellow, I can make small talk and show genuine interest in those who I personally know. The problem is that sometimes I don’t talk without being talked to first, but I’m getting better at that as well. I think the reason that I am like this is because in the past I didn’t really have regular friends and sometimes I was even bullied, but nothing too bad. Now I know some good people, but they don’t like going out or making any plans, I am always the initiator. It’d be nice to find some new buddies.

So am I late for wanting to experience a new activity? If not, what sport usually has the most welcoming atmosphere? I used to play football in elementary and danced for two years. I still like to dance, but I’m also open to try new things. My cardio is not great, but I’ve been regularly visiting the gym.

TLDR: I want to try a new sport and get some new friends. What are some good tips?

17 comments

  1. Can’t help you with tips. But no, no where near too late.

    Here is a test. Take out a small hand mirror and hold it up to your mouth, if it fogs up, it means you are breathing, which means you are not dead. As long as you are not dead, you can, and should, learn new things.

    The challenge for you will be to find sports teams that are playing for the fun of playing, and are not worried about winning. Because if you are just learning then of course you won’t be very good. And dealing with people who have a hard on for winning takes all the fun out of the game.

    Sounds like a great idea. Have fun.

  2. You are 20 years old and your body is heading towards its physical peak 23-32. Even if you are extremely out of shape, this is literally the easiest time it will be to get stronger/more athletic. Yes it will be hard to get into a team as people your age participating in sports will likely have been practicing for 10+ years but, don’t feel discouraged. Practice, workout, and if you’re in school, join an intramural league or play pick up at a local park.

  3. At 20 it is only late to be a professional in that sport but it’s early for everything else.

  4. Frisbee golf might be worth checking out if you have any of those courses in your area. I’m not super familiar with it, but I think it’s fair to say most frisbee golfers are probably not very judgemental

  5. I think it’s normal to feel that way. Once you are past 8 years old or so, a lot of people at any age start thinking they are too old to try new sports, because it’s natural to compare yourself to the people who have been participating for 5 years. You’re not thinking of the future participants who won’t start until they are 30, 40, 80, etc.

    So go, try it out, embrace being new. A lot of folks are natural “teachers” and thoroughly enjoy discussing their techniques and skills to newbies who love to listen. If someone is kicking your ass, compliment them and ask if they have any tips. Have fun

  6. I’ve started several new sports over the last few years, including joining in with bigger communities. I’m over twice your age.

    The only thing to appreciate is that for many sports (but far from all), if you don’t start when you’re five or something, you probably won’t be a world champion. There are cases of people who have never really done a sport becoming an Olympic champion in 4 years, but they’re rare.

  7. Hubs learned to skate and play hockey at 50. It’s only too late when you’re dead.

  8. People try roller derby at 50. If you can start a high contact intense sport like that at 50, you have more than enough time at 20. Go have fun

  9. Depending on where you live, look up adult recreational leagues. There are TONS of sports you can join as an adult and play for fun. Check out your local Parks & Recs guide too.

    I did a bowling league for a couple of years – that was low key and a lot of fun. But I know there are kick-ball leagues and ultimate frisbee groups around town too.

    We’re not talking about folks training for professional teams here, so don’t expect skilled athletes, but if you just want to be social while getting a little exercise, this could be a good option.

  10. Look up rock climbing and bouldering gyms in your area. Cool body movement and usually a fun supportive community.

  12. To each their own preference/interest, but I’ve found jiu jitsu gyms to be great places to meet people if you’re comfortable with a physical sport

  13. No, you’re not too late to pick up a new sport at 20! There are tons of activities and sports you can try no matter your age. Depending on what appeals to you, some popular sports that have welcoming atmospheres could include basketball, soccer, volleyball, and even martial arts. You could also try something more low-key like biking or hiking, or even a team sport like ultimate frisbee. Whichever you choose, make sure to ask around or do some research online to find a group or club that would be a good fit for you. Best of luck!

  14. I’m about to turn 30 and I literally just joined a kickball league this month. There’s nothing wrong with starting a new sport at 20

  16. You’re probably not going to be a professional but you’re definitely not to late to pick up a sport to have a hobby and make more friends. Softball, kickball, flag football, pickup basketball, disc golf, volleyball, tennis, or bowling might be good options depending on your interests and what’s available around you. If you live in a city, there might be rec leagues for adults you could look at.

  17. I started hockey at 19, I still suck but it’s a lot of fun and everyone has been so willing to help. I took cheap group lessons for skating for a while before getting to the playing part. I highly recommend hockey due to how helpful everyone has been. It’s so intimidating starting something later when everyone else started when they were 3. Just gotta put your pride aside and roll with the embarrassment sometimes.

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