Note: I might be autistic because I had 0 social situations in my life where I can practice. Something very obvious and simple to normal people might be what I don’t get.
I had ‘resting murderer face’ for all my life and never learned social skills, because every interaction I had people would look at my with disgust and would shut me off immediately no matter what I said.
I fixed my face and my looks and people started to treat me normal, I am finally being greeted by gym admins that I’ve been going to for the last 3 years, cashiers started looking me in the eye and do small talk. Getting a lot smiles and stares from girls I don’t know.
However, I noticed that people I regularly see, started to look very angry at me. Like they are expecting something from me. And I have no idea what they want from me.
For example, gym greater says hi and I say hi back, then they say how are you and I say good and go to my workout. Then I see them again, same greetings but they are looking at me very mad.
Or a girl is walking past me and she is staring at me and I look at her for a moment and walk past. Then I see her again and she is looking at me with a really mad face.
I’ve spent years seeing the same people in the same places and never interacted with them and they never did. Now after I had a transformation they started noticing me, but they are angry if I don’t do something?
I’m not sure what they want me to do and why they are mad. Please explain me this very basic social situations.
4 comments
ask them because i dont know only they know
A symptom of social anxiety is often perceived negative reactions from others. When I was younger I used to think the same thing: that others were angrily looking at me and I didn’t know why. Now that I’ve gotten older and the social anxiety has improved I notice people’s reactions to me are more often neutral or positive.
So maybe that’s what’s happening? Your brain is tricking you into thinking these people don’t like you?
Maybe people are hoping for longer conversations or interactions with you? I sometimes go into panic mode and walk away after a few sentences too because I cant believe someone is actually speaking to me. Perhaps you are doing the same, but people were hoping for the same. Ive tried to start practicing ‘mirroring’ which is monitor another persons behavior and match it. As in if someone is keen and interested keep talking with them, if they are looking at their watch, stating to walk away, they obviously dont want to talk.
You know how you had resting murder face and people would misinterpret your emotions? Thats what you are doing to other people when you assume they are “mad” at you.