Been in a relationship for 15+ years, the love is there, has always been there. However, I’ve always tried to introduce toys into the relationship and they seem willing, but never overtly excited. I understand for some guys shoving a toy in & out might not be fun for them. They want to use their dick/tongue/fingers etc.. However, I genuinely enjoy toys very much and want him to enjoy using them on me/with me. I want to just ask straight out does this turn you on, but afraid they’ll just say Yes/of course because he does love giving pleasure & wants me to be happy. I know it seems odd considering how long we’ve been together, but yes some conversations are still awkward & this is one of them. I just don’t know if I should just use them when alone (not a replacement at all) and stop trying to incorporate it into our sex routine, or keep pushing. Confusing
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My husband told me that he didn’t know what to do with them and he felt awkward. So once I prepared the introducing session with him and toys. I told him that it is my fantasy, gave him vague head-ups and there were rules –
I am director of this fantasy and I would appreciate if he could do what I want when I want it.
He could watch and couldn’t touch me until I said so.
So first he just watched. It was stimulating and also he could observe how I used those toys on me. I tried to describe how and why it iturned me on. When I was close I instructed him what I wanted him to do and it was really powerful. After that I gave him his toy – c* ring and we tried it. I think that watching me and hearing what those toys did to me – helped him to be more comfortable with and around them. Also the experience of his own with ring made him realized that the toys make it more fun and disrupt the routine.
I’m always in favor of using your words