I (24f) was dating a girl (24f) for 6 months. We were never official, but we had insane chemistry and honestly it felt like an unofficial relationship.
She was adamant she didn’t want a relationship, as she only just found her independence again after a bad breakup/mental health stuff. She wanted time to find grounding and trust/strength in herself first, before being with another person. She was scared of becoming codependent on someone again.
I admire this commitment to herself, but didn’t know what to do moving forward. I was emotionally getting everything I needed without the title, so I stayed.
Up until a month ago, when we started to get incredibly close. I felt like things were moving forward and her friends started joking about her being in a relationship. She panicked and told me she doesn’t want one, but still wants our connection to grow. However she said she also has “cap” or “boundary” on how deeply she can feel so that she can still prioritize herself.
At this point, I decided to end things. I realized I didn’t feel safe and secure to allow my emotions to evolve within this dynamic. As much as she told me she wanted things to stay the same, and for our connection to grow, I could feel the push/pull effect and everytime we grew close shed back away again.
She was devastated that I ended things, but ultimately understood and agreed this wouldn’t be healthy to continue. I expressed to her that I felt if this was ever going to work, it would be because we end things now and maybe we cycle back in the future. She said she had been thinking the same thing, but didn’t want to tell me in case I held onto hope.
Thing is, I don’t know how to navigate moving forward now. We still text every other day. As long as she’s in my life, I’m going to continue seeing her as a romantic partner.
How do I navigate moving on. Is it possible to maintain contact and keep the door open for future romance? Or should we go no contact.
Does it actually sound like something that could be picked up in the future?