So I made a friend recently who I met during a school event a few weeks ago. We don’t know each other super well yet. I know she lives somewhat far from our University but she didn’t mention specifically which town she is from, I only noticed on Facebook that she lives in a small town 2 hours from me… and I recognized the town because I did in fact visit it a few years ago.
Now to the awkward part- my other friend and I are going to an event in the town over from her. I thought about inviting her to the event or if she can’t make it, suggesting we catch lunch the next day as we plan to rent an Airbnb for the night because of the drive. But- I’m certain she didn’t tell me where she lives, and mentioning that I know the town she’s in feels creepy even though its just something that caught my eye. Its possible she doesn’t remember whether she mentioned her hometown to me or not. But I don’t want to come off as weird if she does recall not telling me she’s from X town.
Let me know if my socially awkward brain is just overthinking it. We are both women so I doubt she will think I’m a creep stalking her on fb right?
10 comments
Yeah dawg, don’t mention you know where she lives at💀 . If I was you and I really wanted her to come I’d just start talking to her and when the topic of what I was doing that day came up I’d say I’ll be in “blank town” attending “blank event” wanna come? If she’s interested she’ll come or tell she can’t but she’s nearby and that’s when you say you’ll however long you’ll be in the area then ask her to come over. Don’t make it more complicated or creepy than it needs to be. If you don’t think she told you she probably didn’t.
I would just go with your friend and not even mention it.
Invite her. A town is a fairly general location; knowing the town someone lives in isn’t creepy.
“Hey I’m going to be in this area. Is that near you? Want to get together?”
“Hey! How have you been? I’m going to be in X town next weekend for Y event and I realize that may be nearby you, do you want to grab lunch there on Sunday?”
I feel like that sums up the situation well enough without sounding too weird. I think it’s worthwhile to mention that you are under the impression that they live in the town you’re visiting because there’s a chance that this person doesn’t currently live there and may be confused why you’re asking to meet up there.
“Going to [event], in [area, time], feel like joining?”
Do not offer lunch, allow them to provide the info on location.
Example, they can’t make the event, or lack interest. Segway into a second question on their location, then ask about lunch.
Gives them a feeling of joining in your life, rather then a spot you need filled.
Absolutely overthinking it. If her town is listed on her Facebook page, there’s totally nothing wrong with saying “hey! I noticed your page says you’re in _______. I’ll be at ________ on Sunday and staying over til Monday. Want to come to (event) or grab lunch Monday?”
To be totally honest unless you’re already engaged in a convo, if you just slip out that you’re going where she lives for an event and she remembers that she didn’t tell you where she lives, it’ll be way more weird lol. She probably forgot her social media says where she lives, and then she’d *really* be wondering where tf you found out her location. Plus you mentioned it’s just friends, nothing really to worry about!
Most people can’t remember a quarter of the things they’ve said in conversation. If you wanted to gamble and don’t mind the slight dishonesty, you could ask something like “Didn’t you say you live in X?”
Just be prepared to come clean if they call you out on it.
Edit – An easy way to cover your tracks would be to pick the name of a better known town near the one on social media so they can correct you.
Imo, if you’re friends on Facebook and it lists the city she lives… Not awkward at all. She put the info out there. You can say something like “Hey, you live near X right? I’m gonna be in the area if you want to hang out.”
can you bring it up in like a slick way? send her a picture of your outfit and be like “yes or no? i’m going to xyz concert in xyz town” or something like that. i always ask my friends their opinions on outfits or makeup!