I asked a girl out a couple weeks back. I was really hyping it up, told my mates and they kept saying to go for it so i did.
She really was fantastic; beautiful, stylish, sweet. I really thought i had a chance, that i could finally have someone. I was mid anxiety attack when i asked her and was pretty much curled up on the floor(cringe i know)
She said yes at first. Couldn’t begin to describe how elated i was. I had a date! After years of fancying people who were either taken or not interested in me like that(or straight up didn’t like me)
I told everyone. They were all so happy for me. I couldn’t believe it.
Then she later told me she just got freaked out and blurted it out without thinking and she actually didn’t want to go out with me. As soon as i saw her message my heart dropped. I was just surprised i didn’t see it coming.
I’m trying to remain friends. We got along brilliantly and had loads in common. But she never messages. Never chats, never even makes eye contact. If i wasn’t friends with her friends she probably wouldn’t acknowledge me. Even less so then she’s doing right now.
I understand why she did what she did. It still hurt, but i get it. I just feel like such a fucking idiot. Like, i told EVERYONE. They all looked so happy for me. I was happy. And then it all fell apart. How could i not have seen this coming?
I tried to push past it. I don’t see her often, so i thought in a week ill be okay. But i keep reading those damn messages and i cant stop thinking about it. I feel like I’m still trying too hard. I cant be natural around her, and i never feel like I’m saying the right thing. I don’t want to lose her. Everyone said we would make great friends, but i feel like I’ll never be able to be her friend.
Even typing this up i feel like a pathetic pining loser, but i can’t tell my friends cause they’ve heard enough of my whining, so i have no where else to really go
2 comments
You took a major step in your dating life and I’m proud of you OP. Most people don’t even have the guts to ask out their crush so think of this as a win!
Granted, her changing her mind sucks, and it will hurt. It’s going to hurt for a while but that’s just how life is. Don’t always get what we want. But it’s her decision and it’s best she told you upfront and was honest about it. Not better to lead you on for weeks and then crush you.
The truth is, you will tell your mates and they’ll crack jokes, or even say she doesn’t deserve you. But hey, there will be ample opportunities and no, never consider yourself a loser for being rejected. Happens to the best of us OP. Good luck.
Instead of focusing on the rejection, rather look at the positive, you went out of your comfort zone and you asked her out. You gave yourself the chance, and yes, it didn’t go the way you would of liked, but you need to have the mindset that it’s her loss. Know your value and your own worth.
Perhaps, it might be better for you to distance yourself away from her and I would look at getting back out there and meeting women.