Hi, so I (18F) have been dating my boyfriend (22M) for about a month now. I am a virgin and he is not, I did bring this up before we even started officially dating and he’s never put any pressure on me for anything and is really respectful about asking for consent for what i’m comfortable with anytime we make out or anything. The thing is, I’ve had chances in the past to lose my virginity but i haven’t and now I think I want to, because I feel safe and comfortable and respected with him and I think I would regret not allowing myself this. The problem is I have really terrible anxiety and some trauma that makes it incredibly difficult to bring forward my wants and needs. furthermore i think he won’t initiate until I say something because he is respecting me. I just don’t know how to bring it up or when (especially since we both still live at home and almost always have people around). But yeah I’m just not sure what to even say or how and I would appreciate any advice.
2 comments
Tell him directly that i want to take our relationship to next step. Tell him you really turn me on and i wanna make love to you.. this should do!
hey there! i completely understand ur position. sometimes it can be a little confusing on how to go about it. it sounds like sitting him down and telling him where you are at mentally may be a bit challenging for u bc of your anxiety so have you tried maybe writing it all in a letter and giving it to him? sometimes taking time to write out your feelings, reading it, and giving it to your partner makes things easier so that your nerves aren’t going crazy for u to talk. you got this though! goodluck 🙂