For the past year I’ve not been able to achieve/maintain an errection consistently and it’s gotten to the point where I might just give up sex. I’ve done everything from working out consistently , drinking a lot of water , not smoking or drinking , eating healthy, not masturbating but when it’s time for sex I either can’t get hard or I get hard and just nut quicker than usual, I don’t know what it is , I don’t feel nervous or anything. The last time I felt normal in bed I was high for it but within the past year about 85% of the time when I was high I can’t even get up(what’s funny about that is when I first started smoking I was constantly having sex with the girl that introduced me to smoking for a couple months and if anything it made me hornier) . I even started taking medicine for a few months because I thought it was anxiety or depression because I did experience situations like pregnancy scares and even people threatening me for having sex with certain girls. However I don’t think it’s any of those because I’ve been through them before and have always recovered . I really don’t know what’s wrong with me, I’m seeing a doctor within the next week to see if it’s something physical but I was able to get hard masturbsting before I quit a while ago even when this was still a issue so I really don’t know. Anyone else been through anything similar to it or could offer advice?
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Disclaimer: Not a doctor, so don’t take everything I’m saying as gospel. Also avoid anything drastic that people might recommend around the internet, it’s good that you’re going to see a doctor.
A possibly safe thing you could try is just relaxing your pelvic floor, and doing some stretches. Just look up “pelvic floor stretches” and go through some of them. Also, you could try slightly “pushing out”, like you’re trying to pee, but not too hard. Doing this softly will relax your pelvic floor, so you can try it during masturbation.
Might just be a positive feedback cycle. You weren’t able to get it up once, and then got worried, making you less likely to get it up next time, and so on and so forth.
Sometimes all it takes is one failed encounter to set the ball rolling. The next time you’re worried you won’t get there, and the worry is self fulfilling. You mentioned meds but suggest they were for the anxiety. Tadalafil works, physically but also mentally by reducing the specific anxiety around sex because you know things are ‘in hand’. Your doctor should help you get what you need.