I refer to that japanese thingy with the red ropes which is super visually aesthetic, but at the same time looks pretty uncomfortable and unpractical.
I am just wondering if I should even try, cause I’m afraid that I’ll have all that work and then will just end in an awkward situation where it’s uncomfortable to her and we’ll be like “ok let’s just take it off and do it without the ropes”.
Does it make it difficult to have sex? Anyone with experience care to explain?
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Shibari or Kinbaku is as sensual or clinical as you make it. Practice, and learn how to be safe (where not to tie, safety scissors, etc.) before you try to take it to the bedroom. Take some time with your partner and talk about what you want to do/have done before, during, and after
Maybe you guys could try some bondage tape first before attempting shibari. If you want to give it a go, read some books, watch some videos, get some cotton bamboo or silk rope and safety scissors and practice your knots in a non sexual setting before you try it in the bedroom. It makes the person tied up feel vulnerable and submissive which she may or may not be into.
Depends on the partner. For some, any discomfort that comes from how they are tied up can add to the eroticism. And the level of discomfort will be different depending on how the person is tied.
What’s the purpose of the bondage? In the artistic rope you are referring to, the act of creating the final “bondage” is part of the erotic or submissive/bottom experience. There is a powerful connection during this between the rigger and the subject.
There are many basic rope ties that also serve as restraints, such as the futomomo. You basically end up tied and spead.
Rope requires you to be committed to safety by avoiding nerve compression and vascular injuries. Therefore, you need to learn some basics, or your partner will indeed end up uncomfortable. And never do any bondage without good safety scissors to cut binds in case of emergency.
If the purpose is to restrain so your partner either feels free to struggle or they wish to feel helpless against the sexual pleasures you bring, rope isn’t needed. A simple restraint system or some cuffs will work.
Bondage tape is both fast and easy as well.
Talk together and use the conversation to discover what’s appealing and what you’d both be curious to experience. Then, use that as a road map to study what is necessary to bring it about.
Have fun, be safe.
The answer is: any number of things.
1. Some people enjoy the discomfort. Often bondage is associated with a feeling of vulnerability, and helplessness. Adding some discomfort or pain to that mix can deep that feeling and add a level of eroticism. There is a whole section of bondage called predicament bondage, which is basically creating some degree of difficulty/discomfort, and many people enjoy that. Obviously there is a point where that is too much, but there are many positions that create very mild, or no discomfort. Also some things that look uncomfortable can be quite comfy actually. So option 1 is revel in the bondage
2. Some people enjoy adding discomfort to bondage. So caning/flogging/electro/paddling etc are quite common to add to bondage. Gags, blindfolds, nipple clamps, etc can all be added. As mentioned above I personally love feeling absolutely helpless and then having more sensations “forced” up on.
3. Sex adjacent activities. So often vibrators, toys, fingers, oral, etc are added once someone is bound. People can be edged, denied, have orgasms ruined, tickled, teased etc. These can all be highly erotic. Sometimes the bondage position can make it hard to insert a penis, but can make using toys very easy
4. Sex. Definitely you can tie people where you can absolutely insert your penis into them. And you can basically have “regular” sex with a bound partner.
5. Simply enjoy the bondage. There is nothing wrong with either the top or bottom simply enjoying the bondage. If can have no discomfort, and either partner can masturbate, simply look, simply feel, simply enjoy the conneciton.
Consider checking out r/BDSMAdvice r/bdsmcommunity, and r/ropebondage as well
If you have any other questions about bondage feel free to ask below.
Untie them ??
As several people have already said, if you want to try shibari, research, learn how ans where to tie to avoid injuries, nerve damage etc, always have something to safely cut the rope nearby, and practice before adding sex to the mix.
If you want to test sex with restraints without committing to learn shibari, bondage tape or velcro thingies can do the trick (but I personally find shibari to be more erotic, but we find pleasure in the act of tying itself )
For me, being tied can put me in a floaty, relaxed space, and it can be really lovely just to exist there for a bit.
When I tie someone else, sometimes I’ll tie them in positions so we can do impact play.
Other times I’ll tie them to leave their ass or genitals exposed and then touch them while they can’t move or touch me back. I like the level of exposure and vulnerability created.
[Shibari](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_bondage) is a way to be physically close WITHOUT having actual sex. It was developed 400+ years ago, when BC didn’t really exist, and prostitutes (Geisha) had a lot more control over how things went. If you are interested in PiV sex, I suggest that you stick to a more western rope technique.
You leave and make yourself a sandwich.