Found myself some new confidence lately, had a girl I worked with a while ago ask me out. I’ve been seeing this girl for a little bit now, been on a few dates, looking to progress things a little further, my birthday is this weekend and I feel like it may come up on our next date, I know this doesn’t mean anything on its own, but I can’t help but think things may progress at a faster rate because of that. On the off chance that I am wildly successful and end up getting to the bedroom with this girl, I feel like I could use some advice, looking for constructive advice from men, women, anything that might help a first timer, any advice is appreciated…
25 comments
Relax and have fun
Short and simple advice: ladies first.
Expanded, don’t round out all the bases too quickly, make sure that she’s able to properly enjoy herself throughout the whole experience. It’ll make you both feel a lot better for it.
Don’t overthink it. Stress is a boner killer.
Also don’t watch too much porn and go into it with the fallacy that what you see in porn is reality
Quit porn from right now. Let yourself get horny so you don’t overthink it too much in the moment.
Let her accelerate things and match her energy that way you’re never pushing past her comfort zones. Be an adult and don’t leave marks in noticeable areas. You’d be amazed at where basic, but hot, communication can get you by just saying “tell what you want” or asking “Do you like that” etc
First off- have fun! But responsibly! Wrap up and ride it out! If you’re a virgin, you may not last long- which is completely normal. My favorite thing to say after not lasting long is, “Well, guess you and I will need to practice more!”
Enjoy it dude, take your time before penetrative sex so she can enjoy it too!
Don’t rush things. If you haven’t made out with her yet with lots of touching etc., Try that first on another occasion and leave her and yourself wanting more.
Well, as long as it’s enjoyable. Don’t be all too surprised if it seems “mundane” compared to your expectations. I remember more of what was on TV than I do the actual sex(And the sex lasted an hour.), it was I love lucy.lol But, experiences may vary.lol Either way, the first time is often the most most awkward and often not where the “A game” is at. Take your time to enjoy the moment and really learn about/explore each other. Had sex for the first time at 29. 9 years, one divorce and two kids later… Life comes at ya faster than you might.lol
Please for the love of God and Science , eat her out. Foreplay and make her comfortable. Take care of her needs. If you can’t, it’s okay, strive to do better. THE CLITORIS IS YOUR BEST FRIEND !
Yeahhhhh…… you’re overthinking “your first time” please let her know. Stop putting so much thought into it…. Take your time. It only get better with actual practice. Theory will only leave you thinking at the wrong times
Relax, have a good time, communicate with her, make out, play with her breasts (if she likes it), find her clit.
A lot of women do not orgasm from penetrative sex, so don’t put too much pressure on yourself to make that happen. If you finish fast, you can still make things enjoyable for her and get her off via other methods.
Open communication is the key. Don’t get your hope high up hoping for some mind blowing sex. Most people are awkward on the first trial. But it is very important to tell her how you feel and be honest with her. Then try to focus on her and let her feel comfortable. Her reaction will also give you a boost of confidence.
Honestly bro while an insecurity I think it’s something that should be said that you’re a virgin.
It’s not anything bad! Nothing wrong with it, my thing is let’s say you panic or you can’t get hard then now she might think something is wrong with her.
If you’re not willing to do that, my best advice is ask questions. When you’re about to do something a simple “Do you like this” goes a long way. If you’re doing oral a “tell me where” helps.
On your end say what you like too, if you want more suction during oral say “suck harder.”
Communication is everything and can really separate a good time from a bad. I think you will be less nervous if you tell her you’re a virgin just because she then can really tell you what to do. There’s no expectations if you say you’re a virgin, there is expectations if she thinks you’re not, and you disappoint her.
Does she knows you are a virgin? Because she may want to be in charge and teach you
Im going to cover psychology, youve got plenty of sex advice.
Approach this as something you guys are doing TOGETHER. Its not just about you doing stuff to each other, its about getting to know one another on this level and sharing what you each think is good.
If you lose your erection or come too soon that doesnt mean its over or that you should withdraw from intimacy with her, this is about a shared journey.
Be aware that theres a chance you could have post coital sadness or euphoria afterwards. Dont get wrapped up in yourself, remember to connect with your partner during the afterglow.
Tell her up front that you’re new to things & want to be respectful
Tell her you’re a virgin
Make sure your junk is clean.
Figure out how to be good at eating pussy. I promise this is the best advice I could ever give.
Don’t get disappointed if it doesn’t happen *this time*
Take your time.
Don’t over think it. It’s a natural thing and it will happen how it needs to. Do make sure she knows you’re a virgin cause if you blow your wad straight off at least she will know why. And yes you will likely do that and yes that is OK.
Compliment her and act excited that it’s her you’re with. Not just that you’re with someone. But her specifically. We all want to feel wanted and honestly if a guy seems genuinely enthusiastic to be with me specially its a huge turn on.
Be open about protection.
Listen during sex. It’s too easy to get caught up in the moment but if she needs you to stop for any reason or sounds in pain you need to stop immediately and ask if she’s OK.. Too many blokes have continued after I’ve asked them to stop or yelped in pain due to the fact they were too caught up in the moment to listen to me and honestly it can be really very upsetting and made me feel like a cum dumpster. Don’t be that guy. Listen.
Enjoy yourself and talk to her. Don’t get too serious. I’ve had some of my funniest moments during sex and i love to laugh at an awkward situation or to just laugh having fun. I’ve experienced banged heads, fingers in places they weren’t meant to go. Cramp, a guy farted during sex once which was hilarious. Even fell off a bed once… If something goes wrong. As long as it wasn’t dangerous or whatever feel free to laugh it off and have fun together
If you want tips on how to please a woman, we can give you all the info in the world (do not use things you’ve seen in porn and think they’re reliable. As a woman who watches porn I can honestly tell you that for the most part it’s all fake orgasms – even the squirt ones) but the fact is everyone is different so allow her to be open about what she is enjoying and what she isn’t and what she wants etc and make sure you’re open about that too. Communication is a key part of it a good sex life but with that said. For now just focus on having fun exploring each others bodies and and letting things happen naturally. Good luck dude.
The hole is lower than you think
Cut your nails, take a shower, be happy
Focus on the other person instead of yourself. This will automatically make you a better lover than 99% of men out there.
20F
Some tips:
•Take a shower the day of ( smelly & sweaty is gross)
•shave down there (you don’t have to go bald but atleast trim a bit)
•before the deed excuse yourself to the bathroom and somehow wash a bit down there (it is a 1 way street for piss)
•if you are about to bust and don’t want to/ she hasn’t came yet surprise her with fingering/ oral ( if she’s okay with it) so you can take a break while still giving her the necessary pleasure
•LUBE AND TOYS ARE YOUR FRIEND don’t see toys as a bad thing they’re your teammates when you need a tag out
I’ll add more if I think of any, also good luck have fun and relax!!