Hey there, I am a 20 yo female and I recently moved to Spain. I’ve been living here for a couple of months but I haven’t been able to make friends.
When I go out of work I am tired and go straight to my house, and whenever I wanna go out I don’t get motivation to do it if I don’t go with someone I know (the people that I know are very few so it’s difficult for me).
I’ve recently been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and that kills me because whenever I try to go out I get anxious, and whenever I stay at home and isolate I get depressed.
I really wanna kill my anxiety because being a social buterfly is one of my parameters of success in life but right now in this new city I am so lonely that I feel like a total mess.
That’s why I wanted to try this challenge but I have procrastinated starting it because I know that once I start there’s no turning back: I’m gonna be forced to go out and approach 3 strangers every day!
Whenever I try to speak with someone I don’t know I overthink, I feel very insecure, I try to analize the environment and the person and try to say something but in the end I don’t do anything.
Also, I’m unable to approach groups because I feel that people would be more closed to someone entering in their circle.
Do you think that this challenge is a good idea? Will I be able to do it? Do you have any advice for me concerning the place/event/size of group I should look for when I approach someone?
Thank you for your replies ☺️
1 comment
Read The Game by Neil Strauss. It’s a pickup book geared towards men but it has a lot of good information for overcoming social anxiety like you’ve mentioned that helps with both genders. Approaching 3 strangers a day is one of the challenges that’s within that realm along with a lot of other stuff like that. As a female, things will be a lot easier for you when it comes to approaching strangers.
Also, if anyone is gonna flip over the suggestion of PUA book…please read the book first before downvoting. It has a lot of useful information in there that helps in social interactions with everyday people without the intention of picking up women.