Just happened: Met a girl from an app, she came to my place for wine, we talked, laughed and we finally kissed. It was ok, but there did not seem too much response from her side. I became unsure if she actually wanted to go further and backed off a little, and she didn’t try to get back at it. So we continued talking and then she left, saying she had to get up in the morning. Afterwards we texted a bit and she told me she would have actually liked to hook up with me.
Since I wont see her again as she is a tourist, I’m left confused:
– Is she lying to not hurt my feelings?
– Did she want to continue kissing and having sex, even though she wasn’t too enthusiastic?
– ??
I probably should have directly asked her if she wanted to continue. Still, I’m kinda confused by woman who want to have sex but don’t “respond” too much, as I don’t wanna do smth that she doesn’t like.
Do other people have similar experiences? How do you handle it?
3 comments
This is a very common experience if you are a considerate person. It probably won’t get easier to understand – sorry. Just make sure that you remain conisderate and don’t try to push something.
If woman goes to your place, sex is expected. So you didnt escalate, there was no spark or other issue. Based on what you said.. You should just continue and not stop and not back off.
And you didnt have to ask anything, you should just continue and not stop with just kissing. Never ask such thing. Because she will see that you have no confidence and might say no. If she will not want to continue, she will tell you on her own.
She might’ve just been shy. It’s better to be safe than sorry though. Especially if she was notably unresponsive (that would make me uncomfortable too).
The guys I’ve been intimate with asked if I’m okay/how I’m feeling after initiating going further for the first time. Personally, I always appreciate the consideration