But she works as a hotshot out in the Utah area. She is notorious for taking lots of time to herself to process stuff and she’s an introvert. I haven’t heard anything from her for over a week, which is out of character for her. I know she’s okay, I can see her pop in and out of coverage on find my friends once every other day or so, but she never tells me she’s okay, or texts me to tell me she won’t be in service for a long time. I know she doesn’t need the level of communication I prefer, and she’s so lovely when she does call, but it’s hard for me to go that long without hearing anything from her.
(Background) I was in a (what I thought was an amazing) marriage for 8 years until she left me and took the kids without ever telling me she was unhappy.
Now all I can think of is that my girlfriend is scared of me and won’t tell me if there’s something wrong.
don’t want to sound needy to her, but I want to let her know it’s hard for me to not hear from her. What should I do?
Tl;dr! my gf is a introvert firefighter who takes long communication breaks and it’s really hard for me.
2 comments
In some jobs it is difficult if not impossible to make a call home. I don’t know anything about hotshots, except that they fight forest fires. I know that cellular coverage is scarce in a lot of areas. Even if you can see her on” find my friends” she may not have the ability or time to call.
That being said you should have a talk with her when she is home and find out what level of communication she wants when she is working. She may want to focus on the job at hand and not have to be worried that you are upset because she didn’t call.
If you talk about it with her, you will at least have a better understanding.
If you need a lot of contact and reassurance while she is working and she can’t or won’t give this to you, this may be a dealbreaker in the relationship.
It’s not needy to want to speak to your girlfriend more than once a week, but it might not be possible with his girlfriend, considering her work and her personality. You may need more time to heal from your marriage ending, or you may have healed but have some emotional scarring that you need your relationships not to poke at.