I (30F) went to a meetup event last night and got to talking to this guy who I thought was really cute. We clicked really well I thought and ended up talking for a good portion of the night. We have a lot of common interests and I really felt like he was making an effort to keep talking to me (i.e. asking questions about me, remarking on things, etc). He also bought me a drink at one point and when I declined a second drink he asked if I needed anything, then got me a water. Buying a drink for someone feels like a pretty clear way of expressing interest, right? It does to me but maybe I’m misunderstanding, idk.
I basically swore I wasn’t leaving without his number, but a few minutes before I left, this other guy (who had been hitting on me all night even though I wasn’t all that interested) came over and, while we were talking, interrupted and asked for my number. I froze up and said yes (I know I should work on saying no but it’s hard when they put you on the spot like that) right in front of this guy, so now I’m worried I look uninterested. I didn’t get his number and am wondering what, if anything, I should do next. I figure I have two options:
Do nothing and hope to see him at future events. This is a little risky because it could be a few weeks before I happen to run into him again. It all depends on our schedules. It would be a more natural way to handle it, though–spend some time getting to know each other naturally, and then if/when the time is right we’ll exchange numbers in person. OR I could message him on the meetup app, say I enjoyed talking to him, and give him my number. But… is this creepy? Finding his profile and messaging him just feels a little weird. But it would show clear interest, and then we can hopefully maybe keep talking just in case we don’t both go to any of the events coming up. Plus, he may think I’m not interested because of what happened with the other guy, so this would definitely show that I am.
What do you guys think? I don’t have a ton of luck when I try shooting my shot or being forward, but I haven’t done it a ton and he actually did seem interested. I just don’t want to do anything weird or scare him off. Thanks in advance.
1 comment
Message him. Explain that you were caught off-guard by the other guy and gave the answer that you intended for him if he had asked. Guys can very easily miss signs or jump to tue wrong conclusions. We’re not that smart when we’re distracted by someone we’re interested in (or about most social situations if we’re being honest). If you want to pursue him, leave no question in his mind about it. That way, you at least have the peace of mind that you did all you could.