How would you react if you find out that some guy is obsessed with your girl?

32 comments

  3. Depends a whole lot on 1) how much I trust my girlfriend/spouse and 2) the kind of guy he is

  4. I would have a conversation with the guy to establish what’s going on.. Don’t just start with a position as that may cloud your mind. Work the case, solve it Poirot style.

  5. Kinda depends doesn’t it. Obsessed like hiding under her bed with a knife? obsessed like cant stop sending money on her onlyfans? obsessed like wants to help in her career because she is an amazing singer?

  7. If she asks me to do something about it violence would ensue. If she says she will take care of it, or not to do anything, then I do nothing

  8. Depends on her reaction

    Having been burnt in the past I would assertively say I don’t feel comfortable with it and would like her to put an end to it somehow

    From that point on it’s on her to do something unless the guy gets violent/stalks her in which case I would intervene

  9. Going hrough this rn. It’s been almost 1.5 years and my girlfriend’s ex is still obsessed with her. He calls her, texts her, and emails her at least a few times per month. Every time she blocks him he changes numbers. I keep pushing her to file a restraining order, but she’s afraid it’ll drive him to do something drastic.

  12. Would take it super seriously; restraining orders and all that

    Obsessed people are crazy and crazy people don’t respect life the same way I do

  13. Its happened before and we were able to just ignore and avoid him for the most part, but when he started showing up outside her work and waiting for her outside of class I had a talk with him. He was adamant that she wanted nothing to do with me even though we had been together for over a year, that they were a “perfect” match, they were destined to be together, and that I was just a bump in his road. Instead of getting violent, we got the school to talk to him about his stalking behavior and when that didn’t keep him away she got a restraining order against him. Her manager at work had to call the cops on him 2 or 3 times too.

    He eventually tried to jump me after school one day but I’m about 4 or 5 inches taller than him and had wrestled and trained a bit of MMA so even though he was a high belt in Tae Kwon Do or something similar I was able to use my size to knock him out and call the cops. Luckily I had a couple witnesses too otherwise I may have gotten in trouble. He was got away before the cops showed up but it was caught on camera. I believe he got arrested but I never heard anything officially except that he was kicked out of college and we didn’t see him again.

  14. Depends what you mean, is it the stalking, potential rapist/murderer, threats etc. kind of obsessed?

    Or is it the oneitis, tries and fails to get with her, orbiter, friendzoned kind of obsessed?

    One of these calls for support and getting the police involved, the other should be ignored.

  15. He can obsess all he wants. She’s with me, I trust her, and I know she’s not going anywhere. Especially not for someone who’s obsessive. That shit is unhealthy af

  16. Depends on what obsession means. If dude is into her and that’s it then I don’t care. If he’s making her uncomfortable then we have a problem

  17. Have my girl put an end to it. Especially if it’s an issue, we actually had a dude make multiple Instagram and fb accounts to re add her. She always got creeped out by the dude so she would immediately block him. If he ever harasses her in person I would probably handle it myself. Most people that talked shit online have bitched out in person. I’m a muscular dude and used to do some mma while I was in the military. Never got super deep into it but I know well enough that I have the speed and strength to put someone to sleep. Worst case scenario the dude keeps persuing her after that, then I would go dig a hole and let the steel bark.lol jk… Or am I?

  22. In terms of linguistic shorthand she’s “my girl,” but in reality she’s her own girl and I’m my own guy. We have a mutual agreement between equals to be together in a relationship that excludes romantic relationships with others and sets boundaries around non-romantic relationships that might interfere with our relationship with each other.

    So… when someone is obsessed with “my” girl (which has happened before a few times), I let her handle it. If any of our previously agreed upon boundaries are in danger of being nudged up against, we talk about it. If I have concerns about the guy’s behavior I let her know what my concerns are, and then I let her handle it. If I think we need to set some boundaries around this particular relationship, we talk about it and come to an agreement. It’s her business, not mine, unless it infringes on the explicit terms of our relationship agreement. I trust her to handle dudes crushing on her appropriately… and if she chooses not to, well, I’d much rather get that out of the way sooner rather than later.

  23. This is a constant with women I’ve dated. You get used to it. Insecurity isn’t a thing with me. So it’s just a mild annoyance.

  24. I followed him to her house. Showed him the gun and shovel and promised him the next time she saw him, he be using the shovel to dig his grave. Then I gave him a bullet.

  25. As long as they aren’t acting on it or bothering her, it is what it is. You can’t control other people.

  28. If she don’t ask or explicitly says stay the fuck out of it.

    I’ll do what i always have done.

    Fuck All.

    It ain’t my problem.

  29. Depends how it manifest , if it’s some coworker who obviously has a thing fir her I let her handle it how she wants. If it becomes some actual stalker type shit then I’ll get involved. Not really a need to react honestly, just let your girl handle it .

  30. A bit more context would help OP. Obsessed is subjective and could be defined in multiple ways

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