It’s strange to admit but I was in a psychologically abusive relationship that left me with very low self confidence. And the way our sex life was during it ruined the way I think about sex.
Well, times moved by and now I have a new girlfriend whom I’m extremely happy with, but the self confidence issue has become a huge problem in bed. I can’t seem to get out of my head about it.
I never used to have any issues with sex, I could last a long time. In fact I had to try hard in order to cum. And I never had a problem staying hard. I’d get into a zone when it was time to get sexual and everything would flow extremely smoothly and I’d know just what to do with my hands etc.
Now I can’t barely stay hard long enough to get it in, my movements are unnatural and I find myself not being into it enough. Then I start over thinking about it so I can’t get hard. And it’s all down hill from there. Then when I finally get it in. BAM I cum in like 30sec. What the fuck guys 😂 what happened? My ex took my sexual performance along with all my shit?
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Been through this and currently working on it too!!! I was very upfront and vulnerable about it all with my partner. She is sweet and patient and very supportive. Sex is still fun! I did get a prescription for generic viagra that has helped me get over my initial anxiety earlier on, I now just use it occasionally for a performance boost when we have a little marathon planned. We have a pattern where I kinda need to just let one loose in the beginning but going a few rounds after that is much longer lasting with or without the pharmaceuticals. The foreplay and fooling around is kinda fun for her because of the trigger-happiness too lmao. She gets a kick out of teasing me and making me squirm. I’ve busted in my pants/underwear a few times during foreplay and there’s no shame about it at all. She gets the biggest smile on her face knowing she can do that to me, and i find it hilarious because it makes me feel like a horny teenager again.
It gets better, OP. I’m sorry you experienced what you did in your past relationship, but with the right person you can definitely get your mojo back.