Would you date a single mom? Why or why not? Does the number of kids change your mind?

34 comments

1. >Would you date a single mom? Why or why not? Does the number of kids change your mind?

   No. I’m only 21 years old.

2. Nope! I’m not sure if I want to be a dad and I catch feelings real easy so it’s in my best interest to avoid situations where I resent a child for existing.

3. No. I’m not playing someone else’s save file.

   There is an old saying “alphas spray, betas pay”

   Dating a single mom without your own kids is psychological and financially suicide. She will expect you to have her be your number 1, but you will always be her number 2.

   Only time it’s remotely acceptable is, again, if you have your own kids.

4. I would DATE a single mom, sure. I have before. I am NOT taking responsibility for the child(ren) unless we’re getting hitched.

5. I personally wouldn’t want to date anyone who has kids. I chose a childfree life and I’m most compatible with other people who are childfree.

6. Not ideal. Not saying it’s an absolute no.
   If she had more kids, that would also increase the chances of a no.

   Why? It’s a lot more baggage to deal with and potential relationship issues (assuming shes divorced and not a widow), and for sure, I wouldn’t be top of her mind, rightfully so.

   If I had an option to date a woman with no kids, I’d be way more inclined to pick her over a single mother.

   Though, it’s very likely a no for me…. I’d have to be on the more desperate end, or she’d have to be a truly amazing person.

7. The higher the number of kids and the higher the number of baby daddies, the less likely I am to want to be anywhere near that.

8. I am 56, I would date a single mom if her kids were grown and gone. Last year I did date a woman that was much younger and had 2 kids under 5. With all the drama from her ex, scheduling conflicts with her work and babysitters, I would not do that again, too much drama.

9. Yeah I would as long as the father was completely out of the picture. I also have my own son, however.

10. Only if all kids were full-on adults living independent lives out on their own.

11. Would I casually date or have a fwb situation with a single mother sure. Besides that thought I wouldn’t make one my girlfriend or wife. Don’t get me wrong in the future I’d love to have three kids, but they’d be my kids. Seriously dating a single mother is all of the cons of being a dad, but with out any of the pros from being a father. Plus you can’t discipline the kid/kids how you’d like. Plus the whole “you’re not my dad”. Also she’s always going to put her kids first which makes her a trash gf. If she puts you first then she’s a trash mother. Plus often times those kids are fucked up.

    Seriously dating a single mom for me is membership without benefits. Also you’re going to be paying for another man’s seed. Also for a lot of men who date single mothers. If that woman didn’t have kids, 9.5/10 times she wouldn’t even piss on if you were on fire.

    I don’t date single mothers because I can date other women. There’s no benefit in seriously dating a woman with kids compared to one without any…..negative roi.

12. God can you just search this question in the search bar? The answers are the same each time.

13. I’m a single dad so yes. But if her kids are too young and too many different dads then no. Too young she won’t have time for dating. Too many different dads means she’s got some issues with bad judgement.

14. Most wouldn’t even date me with zero kids so no.

15. Depends on if she’s bad or not 🍿

16. I’d hook with a single mom. Have plenty of times.

    But I won’t be in a serious relationship with one

17. No. It’s a losing agreement, and you have to be completely selfless to do it. I am not.

    You have to become a step-dad eventually otherwise you’re just a fun escape from her life, and not in her life. If you enter her life, you have to accept that her kids will always be number 1. Becoming step-dad also means your resources are now going to that family. And that’s not even counting the possibility of a toxic, potentially violent ex. What’s the upside? *Love*? Pffft. Fuck outta here.

    My step-dad did it and I was grateful to have a father figure in my life because of him, but no. He was a much better man than me.

18. No.
    I’m 23, I’m not ready for kids of my own right now and I’m definitely not ready for other people’s kids.

19. No, my wife would get mad

20. i always said no but tried it this week. still would recommend no.

21. No, I don’t want kids, no

22. It depends. I ewas seeing a girl with one baby girl. She has a good job and seemed mentally stable. Later I learned she has another TEEN boy. I was like OH, hiiiiiii, walks out slowly.

23. When I was single I would not date single moms.

    No benefit to it, many negatives.

24. Yes, but it really depends on custody and what kind of support system she has. Like if going out is going to require her to hire a baby sitter every single time and going to her place is basically impossible, it might be a no-go. Almost certainly would be a no-go. Can’t date someone who doesn’t have time to date.

25. This question pops up weekly. So far these are my findings:
    – 60% NO
    – 30% Been there, done that, NO
    – 10% Maybe / Yes (men with children)

    In my opinion (I’m a woman), it can almost only be a term success situation if both have kids from before or they make a joint one.

26. Been there, done that. When I was 17, I started dating a woman who was 18 and had just had a daughter. We dated for almost 3 years until she cheated. I’ll be honest, it wasn’t easy and I would not recommend it for most men. A baby is a big responsibility. When you are young, it cuts into your alone time and can be a bit overwhelming.

    I’m 54 now and long time married. I have two young adult daughters in college. If something happened to my wife or my marriage, I suspect that I would once again date a single mother, but I would also expect adult children or at least older teens.

27. I used to be indifferent, but now after personal experience with 2 of them, I can confidently say I’d probably decline dating a single mom unless she impressed me to an exceptional degree for an extended period of time.

28. Tried it and she used me against the baby daddy. I think to make him jealous and get back together. Never again.

29. People never talk about the biggest issue, imo, when dealing with single mothers.
    The attachment that you may start to develop with the children.
    If you and the mother break up… You can just be hanging with a kid that isn’t yours.
    And the mother is going to let you do that.
    The mother will move on, and kids forget pretty quality.
    You’ll be the one stuck and hurt.

    If you don’t have kids, it is in your best interest to be with someone that doesn’t have kids as well

30. 🙅‍♂️

31. As long as the kids are grown and out of the house, then I wouldn’t mind dating a single mother.

32. I find Moms more attractive and the number doesn’t bother me, it’s how many baby daddy’s there are.

33. Nope, my reason is quite simple.

    1- If she’s single and the baby daddy is alive, either he is a problem or she is (otherwise they would’ve stayed together).
    2- You will never be of importance as their child and at some point you’ll be expected to provide for the child.
    3- If the child is old enough to understand that you’re not the father (insert Maury noises), negative situations between you and the child will be very likely to have it thrown into your face.

    I also realise that this is a real world, and you will have shitty people and shitty situations, like unfaithful partners that cause the split, but the media glamourising the whole strong independent single mother shouldn’t be praised – especially considering the negative long term effects it has on the children.

34. Is she boring prude? Does she offer anal on first date? Does she have big areola? These are my concerns for dating.