Why is this guy so weird with me?

49 comments

1. Based on this info alone, no one can obviously know. I will just take a shot in the dark and say he is shy and likes you.

   Yes he might have had girlfriends in the past perhaps he eventually got over his anxious behavior

2. Hey I’m a 22(M). I’ve had gfs in the past ,I have been single for almost like 2-3years now I guess. I also have similar situation I think and I can relate with this dude. Sometimes it is just difficult you know. I have a crush on a girl from my class. She is cute and nice but when ever she is around me I feel uncomfortable and weird. I feel like she might judge me or something bad might happen. So I usually avoid her. I asked her number and she gave it to me but I didn’t contact her for the last 4 months. I Genuinely have feelings for her and what if she turns out to be those “nice girls” you know . He is probably over thinking stuff like me. My suggestion to you is , approach him and ask him about this matter directly and don’t do it when he is with his pals. If my assumption is true,he probably likes you I think .

3. This is exactly how I behave around my crushes lol. It’s the anxiety

4. Maybe he’s pregnant

5. [deleted]

6. You should start texting back and forth, see how he responds. “How have you been? I’m just doing ——— and it reminded me of you. Remember when you did that * insert funny or smart thing*.” Most introverts can loosen up a bit more via text. Ask him what he’s interested in, if you think he’s dateable then ask him out for coffee. If he acts weirded out then I’d just cut it off there. Either he’s cute and painfully shy or he’s a meddling creep who’s keeping people around for his own ego.

7. He’s prolly socially awkward. Try asking what he likes and dig on his hobbies, that way he’ll open up.

8. He’s probably overwhelmed by you and doesn’t know what to do when you’re around, overanalyzing every breath he takes. Been there, done that and i can imagine how awkward it can be for the one you’re talking to.

   Texting will in general help to understand him a bit and gives him the chance to think about what he says and stress out less about it. You’d probably have to take the initiative there at first, if you’re up for that. If that doesn’t work, it’s up to you to decide if it’s worth continuing with.

9. he’s edward cullen

10. sounds like he has an insane crush on you and doubts himself a lot/ thinks he has no chances since he believes you are like perfect

11. Invite him to hang out.

12. It’s hard reading people.

    There is this guy at work, who is a social butterfly and very chatty and witty with everyone else, but is silent, reserved, and straight to the point with me. Either hates me or likes me. At first it bothered me, but now I ignore him.

13. He might actually like you, like you and not just like you.

14. He has a huge crush on you and can’t handle it.

15. Bro has anxiety

16. He probably has a huge crush on you and gets nervous every time he’s around you. But he’s definitely into you.

17. That’s kinda cute, he definitely likes you

18. He likes you. That’s why.

19. i feel like u should literally ask him, be honest. next time you hang out ask if you’re bothering him in any way..notice his behavior while you ask him

20. I will take a shot but maybe woman anxiety and being alone with a woman put him really uncomfortable but when you’re in group it’s ok

21. Maybe he has PTSD from his past relationships so he is afraid but still wants to have a relationship

22. I think he needs therapy

23. Now at first I was like yeah he hate yo ass but the truth is he was probably most likely scarred from those past relationships which can have an effect on how you communicate with people you are attracted to, I know because it sounds it bit like me. Acting as if your uninterested to mask the anxiety and fear of possible rejection or ridiculed about who you are.

    My advice tell him you notice the signs of his body language in a caring way. And as far as in person communication, envision the peeling of an onion; accept you can’t change him but encourage him to do so. Common ground will overcome the tension he may feels when you are around.

24. Whatever his reasons, this isn’t well-adjusted behavior.

25. Total opposite. He most likely does like you, and there’s a good chance he doesn’t know how to talk to women

26. He either really do or don’t like you.

27. He is totally into you and got too nervous for not screwing up interactions with you. As this didn’t go to plan he is now on top of it ashamed of himself. He also might go through something and is not yet ready for making an impression on new people he likes and needs a save space atm.

28. i think he likes you but he is also scared about the effect you produce or the emotions he goes through on seeing you. I remember there was a girl i liked and i had a strong limerence for her. He is scared of the effect you have on him. For some people, it is really scary to go gaga over a girl and lose composure in her presence.

29. He likes you. This is how I’m currently behaving around my crush but way worse. I don’t have the balls to ask her out yet.

30. Sounds like Edward from Twilight. He’s a vampire.

31. If it’s really awkward and you feel like you’re being a bother, why do you keep hanging out? No one should make you feel bad just for existing in their presence.

    Maybe it is just anxiety on his part but if it’s making you have negative feelings you have to look out for yourself first.

32. It sounds like he likes you, but also has social anxiety.

33. It astounds me how people come to reddit to SPECULATE WITH STRANGERS…instead of just speaking to the person and asking. Good gravy.

    What are you expecting to get by coming to reddit and asking these people about someone they don’t even know?

    Why not just ask the guy? Do you think he’s gonna hurt you for asking a question?

34. Lmao, I’m 100% sure that I’ve seen this post before, months ago. Everything you said here was there word for word.

35. Sounds like he might have a crush on you but is immature and awkward about it. You said he had girlfriends in the past and therefore “he knows how to talk to girls”. First off, that’s not true. Just because he had a gf in the past doesn’t mean he isn’t awkward with girls. you have no idea how his relationships started in the past. He might have been just like this with past girlfriends before dating them. Second, if he wasn’t awkward with girlfriends in the past, he might have had a bad experience that cost him his confidence and gave him anxiety with crushes, resulting in him being awkward now.

    My advice: talk to him about it in a calm non-accusatory manner. Find out

36. he definitely doesn’t hate you

37. Ask ChatGPT

38. I think he is getting periods mood swings.

    Just sit and talk to him you will get the answer. Don’t assume anything in you mind. Just clearly talk to him. Because you never know if he had some bad experience That’s why he is acting like that.

39. I am a behavioral therapist for children & teens with autism and related disorders and some of what you have described sounds similar to the behaviors some people on the autism spectrum can exhibit. Those with autism spectrum disorder can be on the spectrum to a severe level or a very minor level, so minor that many would never even realize they are on the spectrum at all in most situations. Those with autism tend to have a level of difficulty surrounding communication and social interactions. They don’t always abide by typical social cues or routines and can seem aloof or even inconsiderate, but this is not the case. This is completely a guess based on the minimal information and I could be completely incorrect here.

    My second guess is that he has a very strong dismissive avoidant attachment style. Everyone has an attachment style and dismissive avoidants tend to fear and avoid situations that make them feel vulnerable or that stand to encroach on their independence. They also fear failure so vulnerability makes them feel susceptible to failing or brings up emotions they are very uncomfortable with and it could be that you bring up these emotions in him, so he bolts (avoids). Check out attachment theory & the dismissive avoidant. Those are my best guesses.

40. Looks like you got yourself a crush

41. Perhaps you look just like his mother and he secretly lusts after … you.

42. Does his skin shimmer in the sunlight?

43. He is just shy lmao. Maybe get him to open up about sum he likes!

44. He’s got serious anxiety issues, but he digs you a lot. He’s just being a little b about it. You might be smoking hot

45. bro sounds like me with my crush 😭😭😭

46. bro sounds like me with my crush 😭😭😭

47. Might not be the answer, but I can say that I have acted fairly similar to people I’ve been limerent for. It’s not very well known, but limerence is a pretty intense psychological phenomenon where you are obsessed with the idealized version of someone. Think a crush, but less of the good butterflies and more of bats with barbed wire on their wings in the pit of your chest.
    If you’re unfamiliar with the concept, I recommend looking into it as it really helped me understand why my perception of love is so intertwined with grief and apprehension, rather than connection and adoration.
    Once again, I could be wrong, but one possible explanation is he is grappling between making a connection with you or keeping himself safe.

48. Man likes you my dude. He’s probably experiencing Jitters and all.

49. Mfs saying they can’t tell. He like u fasho lil mama. Your decision if you like him back and are ok w someone nervous. Guys typically overcome nervousness when you spend more time together. Don’t drown him tho