Long story short; I used to have a very high libido, but with my current partner I find it very hard to initiate sex. Once we have sex, it is great! But the foreplay is just… A chore? It feels a bit repetitive? I feel terrible about this, but I almost never initiate it and it is putting pressure on our relationship. I want to better myself, but I’m not really sure how.
I used to have a very high libido and I experimented a lot with my previous partners, but I have lost my sexual spark with my current partner. It’s not that I am not attracted to her. In fact, I find her hot as shit! But the foreplay is just difficult and repetitive (because she mostly initiates and she knows what she likes).
My partner has a very high libido and she starts it 90% of the time. And once we get into it, it is great. But the foreplay is just not my best part and many times it turns me off. I think the problem is that she needs to kiss to get turned on, and I only feel like kissing ONCE I am turned on.
We’ve been together for a long time, and it feels like it is mostly the same routine. I need something to break the spell.
Dear people of Reddit, can you give me some inspiration for foreplay? What do you do to turn on your partner (besides kissing)?
3 comments
does she cum during foreplay?
Does she like spanking? Bend her over your knee and alternate spanking and fingering.
Be playful, make out in the shower but don’t let her touch you, or turn her around, kiss her neck and don’t let her touch you.
Blindfold her, and touch and tease her till she’s begging.
Just have her staddle you and play with her tits for awhile.
Really build up the anticipation before that first thrust. Rub her clit with it, tease the entrance, start to go and wait for her to get impatient.
Rub her over the clothes.
Do all of these while kissing, so as she gets what she needs and hopefully keeps your motor running.
Massages.
Foot massages leading to sex.
Back massages leading to sex.
Whole body massages… You get it.
The addition of oils and a certain atmosphere like candles being lit will add to the arousal settings.
Teasing, edging and orgasm denial is a definite change-up if this Isn’t your normal go-to. The teasing part should be familiar enough, edging and orgasm denial however is something that is levels above that. It’s just a matter of figuring out if first, you’re into it, and just going for it when experimenting with it.
Since the kissing part for you requires a build up, use that as part of a role play, take on a dominant character (communicate this of course with your partner) and play with that e.g. “You don’t get to touch any part of me until I’m ready for you. Do you understand?” She responds and then you play with her until you get to being turned on. She might need to be tied up too, to ensure she doesn’t touch you until you want her to. That is just an example though, fix the scenario to whatever else that fits you both.