I’m going to see this girl and I know she’s into me and I don’t want to fumble it. The problem is that I cannot talk to people for the life of me, I get too nervous to even open my mouth infront anyone besides a handful of people I’m close with and on the rare occasion when I do speak, I stutter like Porky pig. When I say that I can’t talk to people I mean it. I have been meaning to get better at speaking to people and try to be less nervous when doing so but it’s just so daunting and scary. I look up how to get better but it just seems impossible. I keep thinking of that thing that Kafka said where said something like “I write differently from how I speak” etc and I really relate to that because I have a relatively good vocabulary and most times I have something valuable to add to a conversation but actually expressing it in spoken word is impossible. The worst part is that when I was younger, I was really talkative and many people who knew me at that age have stopped talking to me because I’m so reserved now and I fear that someday I will have nobody because they all left me because I can’t hold a conversation
So, what should I do, I really wanna speak better and be more comfortable with talking, how do I improve?
2 comments
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Y’know, I can relate to a lot of what you expressed here. I am much more of a writer than I am a speaker as well. I fumble with words often.
I’m generally a quiet guy, and like silence. But I think this can negatively impact my ability to speak. I work in solitude often.
I’ve found something that helps me with loosening up my speaking is listening to a lot of spoken words during the day. Sometimes podcasts, or an audiobook, comedians, or your favorite travel vlogger can help break the rust off of the language-processing and producing bits of our minds. Or so it feels to me!
I’d say try that – just watch/listen to some entertaining videos of someone whose character and/or speaking you enjoy or admire, steep yourself in it, and see if you notice a difference in your own speech and mood later that day.