I recently watched the film Bliss (1997). In it it was said that ejaculation and orgasm are two different things. So I ask men, what do you think about this? Because most people think they are one and the same. I, as a woman, think it’s clear that even though I have several orgasms during sex, there are many times when I still feel unsatisfied with sex. I want something else. Not just orgasms, much more than that. Here I would ask women, what do you think? Is having an orgasm enough to satisfy you?
26 comments
I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm without at least the reflex on ejaculation, if you go several times in a row you can “run dry” but I think the reflex is still there. I have however had ejaculation that had pretty weak orgasms, those are the ones that leave you unsatisfied
I can have amazing sex and be satisfied without cumming, however I don’t know how that works for a man since “lust” works a bit different for them
My ex bf had a prostatectomy due to cancer. He never ejaculated but he did orgasm, so yes, they can be mutual exclusive.
Speaking personally as a woman, I want to orgasm. Sex can be good without one but it is the goal.
Oh yes, yes, yes.. I feel satisfaction even when I don’t come, but the partner needs to give me love, cuddles and appreciation. It feels like an emotional coming.
Ejaculation and orgasm are indeed two different things. Rule of thumb for men, however, is that orgasm is usually accompanied by ejaculation.
As for satisfaction in sex in general… it should depend from person to person no? I imagine an attentive partner that doesn’t quite get you there for whatever reason, but still treats you right, is better than a shitty partner that sort of gets you there (mostly because you know your own body which helps), but you’re rushing through it because they’re not really that attentive.
Definitely. My GF and I sometimes have sex 2-3 times a night and in a three day weekend she might cum 2-3 times and I might cum once or twice. The relentless pursuit of orgasm gets in the way of enjoying the intimacy and connection of intercourse. We sometimes will fvck for 20-30 minutes and then talk and nap for a half hour, then resume. To me, it’s the way sex should be.
I can have amazing sex without the need to cum. I don’t know if I’m in the minority but sex isn’t about getting off for me. It’s more about the intimacy and act of it, shared with the person you like. Ejaculating is just like an added bonus, if it happens that is.
Yes definitely! Would rather have phenomenal sex over an orgasm any day! having an orgasm isn’t enough to satisfy me…. A good “session” is
I think she’s mostly asking women, but I see only men chiming in
For me personally (female here) I love sex, I love the feel of it, I love connection, closeness, any kinks being done, whether oral, PIV, or anal. When engaged with another person the sexual act are enough satisfaction, it just feels good from start to end. It feels amazing to orgasm, sometimes even when I reach them I don’t feel satisfied. Especially when masturbating, they never leave me satisfied, only leave me needing or wanting more, bc I need the whole experience with some one else to feel satisfied.
It depends on what you want out of sex. Is it an expression of intimacy for you? Is it pure monkey-fuckin’? Are you making love or having sex?
As a penis-haver, I’ve had very satisfying sex spending hours just eating out a woman and not even touching myself. I’ve also been deeply satisfied just getting a blowjob and not reciprocating, and giving a blowjob and getting nothing back. I’ve had deeply emotional and intimate sex, and I’ve had raunchy and purely physical sex. I’ve been completely submissive and restrained and completely dominant.
All of those things have been deeply satisfying at times and unsatisfying at others. It depends on where I’m at, what I want, and who I want it with.
Sometimes, I just want a quick fuck with whoever’s hot that’s around. Sometimes I want to be treated like a god, and sometimes I want to treat someone else like a god. Sometimes I want to release control and be completely submissive, sometimes I want to be in control and dominant.
Orgasms certainly help – as a cismale, I’m pretty well wired to target the orgasm and I had to spend years learning to enjoy the journey as much or more than the destination. But they’re not required.
Phenomenal and satisfying sex comes from only one thing, the largest sex organ in your body – *your brain*. It requires understanding yourself *and* your partner, and knowing how to meet each other’s needs.
As a woman, I can have sex without orgasm and feel fully satisfied afterwards. I can also have weaker orgasms or be close to another one, but lose it and be unsatisfied.
My husband has definitely experienced orgasms without ejaculation, but interestingly enough, he has no idea he didn’t ejaculate. It’s happened a few times during bj’s, but we haven’t noticed them during sex and he’s never had one during masturbation. At first, he legitimately didn’t believe me when I told him he didn’t cum. There is definitely a physical reaction, but nothing comes out. It’s always the first one, and then he can get a second really intense orgasm where he does ejaculate and it’s super exhausting for him.
Sex is all about connection. You have to be able to make love to the soul. That’s what all women really want. Once you figure out that technique you become the favorite lover of all girls you make love to.
As a woman I love finishing but there’s more to sex for me than that!
Have had sex and didn’t cum and it was still great. Have had sex came and didn’t like it at all. Have had sex orgasmed with out ejaculation. Have had sex and didn’t like it and didn’t cum. All forms.
I (35m) have had lots of phenomenal sex with no orgasm, and Ive had lots of bad sex with orgasms.
Orgasms are great, but they arnt what determines good or bad sex. Best sex ive ever had is intimate, full of handsiness and kisses, a clear desire to be up against the other person. That mutual desire and build up is hella satisfying.
I have recently been put on a different pain medication, I have had 6 back surgeries and counting and I have been on Percocet for 3 years and was told I needed a break and I was put on morphine. A week maybe after starting the morphine I have been unable to ejaculate and believe me we have tried and tried sometimes until she was sore the next day (bless her heart) I am now getting depressed from not being able to “finish” it feels great and I feel like I get close but then the feeling leaves me. Like I said it feels great but not being able to ejaculate leaves me unsatisfied and frustrated.
I sometimes orgasm without ejaculating, but ejaculating feels much more fulfilling. Its like taking a nap vs a full nights sleep. Sometimes a nap feels more satisfying, but shorter or less deep. Full sleep is almost always more satisfying but can make you groggy lol
Sex in & of itself isn’t satisfying without love. I’ve had a lot of sex, a lot of hookups, and a lot of relationships. Balanced healthy relationships tend to have balance in the bedroom and other parts of life. But swx in & of itself is not enough to satisfy someone in life. Ppl r more complicated.
I am a man and have had amazing sex without orgasms or ejaculation. I can be happy either way
Sex can still be great without cumming. I’m a strong believer in the journey as cliche as that sounds, but I’d be happy to not cum sometimes but my girlfriend also enjoys finishing the deed
When i was practicing trantrism, i experienced amazing “orgasms” without cumming. The advantage is that you can have multiple orgasms and last for hours.
Some women don’t like it though, since if i don’t cum they feel like they’ve failed in some way.
Personaly, if sometimes i want to cum, i also can feel plenty satisfied without cumming.
I can have 2 or 3 dry orgasms before I finally ejaculate, they are intense but not a true climax
As a male, I can have orgasms without ejaculation, I can ejaculate without orgasms. Although the later is sometimes less satisfying
As a chick who can’t orgasm with another, I’ve had fantastic sex a few times.
I’ve had that “phenonemal feeling” before ejaculation a few times but it definitely left me with that uncomfortable “blue balls” feeling afterward (which can be borderline painful, but it’s really not the big deal it’s sometimes made out to be)
Each of these times, it was also followed by the ‘proper’ ejaculation. But the ejaculation wasn’t the “best part” of the act.
Just my experience.