I dont think im the best at dating scene or gauging initial encounters so itd be nice to hear some thoughts… im 30 years old and honestly looking for a serious long-term relationship I met this woman on a dating app last week. She is extremely attractive, skinny with giant breasts. 29 years old, has a good job and lives alone. Seems kind and down to earth mostly. We messaged for a couple days and then met up for drinks and tacos. Unfortunately, I had been drinking with a buddy prior to meeting her and then drank more with her so I was pretty drunk lol. Regardless, the date went very well and led to going back to her apartment afterwords. I had no intentions of hooking up on the first date so i had to pick up condoms on the way. We had great sex and I could tell she enjoyed herself. Ive had sex on first dates before and one night stands, but im legit looking for something real at this point… I left afterwards and we’ve been texting a little the past couple days. She first asked if I wanted to hangout again next weekend and I agreed. And now today she asks me if I wanna come over and Netflix and chill…. lol
I’m nervous that she’s just playing me or something and will ghost me after she’s had her fun… I really don’t know though.. What are your thoughts?
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I think dating has changed and people are stressed and lonely after the last couple of years. I imagine it could be a bad sign. I could argue it’s a reflection of life today. But hey….WW3 might start next week. I’d just see how it goes. Ultimately if she likes you, you two can talk about it.
Doesn’t have to be. There’s no “rules” to this stuff and the idea that you have to on a certain amount of dates before having sex is arbitrary and should just be based on what you’re both comfortable with. Opening yourself up to a relationship is always scary and inherently leaves you vulnerable, regardless of sex. The only way to know is to try and see what happens.
I dont think sex is bad on the first date if you talk for a bit before hand. That being said I’ve always had bad experience with sex first date ppl I’ve dated long or short term
Sounds like this belongs in r/ihavesex
>but im legit looking for something real at this point..
She’s not it imo.
Not a bad sign. People move at their own speeds with what they are comfortable with. Have a conversation with her about what she’s looking for.
It is a personal preference thing, but I wouldn’t seriously date anyone that sleeps with me on the first date.
“Sex on first date… bad sign?”
Personally, speaking I’ve never broken up with anyone because we had sex on the first date. If it was great, we continued to casually see each other and if other things fell into place and things evolved into something serious then so be it.
When it comes to dating men are fine with reading the book one chapter at a time to see where things go. Women want to know how the story ends before they buy the book!
Every “serious relationship” I ever had began as casual dating and *evolved* into serious.
I never proactively went *looking* for a girlfriend or a wife.
Each of us has our own mate selection screening process and must haves list.
Each of us has our own boundaries and “deal breakers”.
Whenever two people *identify each other* as being *special* they seek exclusivity.
It’s got nothing to do with when you had sex the first time.
Couples tend to split for three basic reasons.
1. They chose the wrong person. (In other words they are too incompatible.)
2. A “deal breaker” was committed in one of their eyes.
3. They fell out of love or stopped wanting the same things over time.
There are two basic reasons why someone will not commit to you.
1. Timing (Settling down/getting married isn’t a top priority for them right now.)
2. They don’t believe *you* are “the one”.
Ideally you should share the same values, want the same things, naturally agree on how to obtain those things, and last but not least have a mutual depth of love and desire for one another. Like attracts like and opposites attract divorce attorneys! 😂
Compatibility trumps compromise. 😉
***”Dating is primarily a numbers game…. People usually go through a lot of people to find good relationships. That’s just the way it is.”*** – Henry Cloud
Best wishes!
That is my initial thought honestly.. even though I’m always willing to go forth with sex in the moment. It just seems difficult to understand a woman having a similar mind than mine, but with the same token, ultimately I believe that may be what I desire as long as we’re both honest, accountable and sincere…
Lol as many girls I’ve had sex with, I’m surprised I still haven’t had a STD scare yet lol… so far she seems like she really wants to watch a movie and chill together too.. we’ll see I guess