My girlfriend and I have broken up in the past (about a year and a half ago) but recently we got back together. I didn’t realize it so much then but I have noticed now that she has insecurities and it reflects trust issues she has had (falling out with me and her friends).

Scenario 1:

A couple of days ago I was scrolling through my photos and came across an instagram model saved on my phone from months before we even met each other and she asked me about it and I told her the reason it was there (arguing with my friend how tall girls are attractive too) and it ate into her to the point the room got sour.I asked her that I understand how she would feel weird from that but she should not take mind because it was so long ago and I apologized for it being there, but she was not having it. She started accusing me over things like “who other girls are on your phone that i don’t know of”. I reassured her that I do not talk to other girls aside from her and showed her some proof of this but started telling me I am disappointed in you for that. We talked about it and moved. But to be fair the reason the argument escalated is because she totally misjudged the date of the pic and rolled with it until I realized it when I was going through my photos after I agreed photos of that nature I don’t believe she noticed the date error but it would have ended a different way.

Scenario 2:

There is this girl I’ve known of and followed on instagram for a while (just mutually know her from friends never spoken to her in my life) a while back my girlfriend was saying how this girl has done her dirty in the past and they don’t speak again (bare in mind I never knew till now my girlfriend knew her) and then fast-forward a couple of days after I see her post something on instagram and remember what my GF told me and I unfollowed her because of it and told her about it because she mentioned her in a conversation with her friend. She later called me that day and got livid that I should have unfollowed her the minute she told me what happened and I obviously got confused by it. She started telling me that I have no respect towards her because if I did, I would have done so. One thing led to another and she started confronting me on all the girls I follow on instagram. These are coworkers, mutual friends and other people I may know of and when she asked I told them who they were but she was still pushing the narrative that I was disrespecting her and I was in the wrong for it. Saying I know she has trust issues and seeing and doing things would make her feel this way but I still believe I have done nothing wrong in this whatsoever even at the time I felt so bad because I believed I was wrong. I told her how I felt and that we would talk about this the next day because we are not going anywhere with this argument and ended the call and didn’t talk to her the whole day. A few hours after the argument she started apologizing for blowing things out of proportion.

I love this girl and I want her to have faith in me but if this continues I don’t see how this relationship would last. I want to try and recommend therapy because at this point I feel like she is projecting her insecurities to me in a way that is not healthy.

\*\*TL;DR; : My girlfriend has insecurities and trust issues and now I feel like she has been projecting it on me; going through my followers and arguing over a picture that was on my cloud photos from months before I even met her. I love this girl and I want her to have faith in me but if this continues I don’t see how this relationship would last.

1 comment
  1. This problem is entirely hers to fix. You can suggest therapy, but you should not stay with a partner that doesn’t trust you.

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