“Handle” is the wrong word but it’s the only word I can think of, I need to know what to do when talking to this friend. Sometimes I feel like the littlest thing seems “messed up” to them, I’m not crossing any major lines, it’s just stuff like me saying the word “blitzkrieg” in a historical conversation and they didn’t think saying that word was okay, or even insulting myself by calling myself stupid or something after messing up is seen as “too much negativity”. other things they seem okay with but there’s things I seem to stumble on at random that they think is ethically wrong when most of the people I’ve spoken do don’t seem to agree. I don’t want to hurt this person or anyone else, but I need a way to converse without hitting dialouge landmines, any advice?
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I don’t think I can advise here because this would drive me crazy, and I wouldn’t want to be around that person. I’d tell them I was tired of walking on eggshells around them, and that they seemed to want to pick a fight all the time.
As with any advice, a grain of salt should be taken with it esp from someone like me who doesn’t know your situation personally or in detail. But If I were in that situation I’d want to firstly make sure that this is someone that I love and value as a friend. Second I would want to figure out exactly what it is about your friends behavior that is causing a problem. Make clear boundaries for yourself and be honest about where a line should be drawn. Make sure you can express clearly what it is that bothers you. Then, be upfront with them and set your boundaries. Be willing to listen to theirs with compassion and willingness to compromise. Maintain your dignity and adhere to their guidelines of respect but also make it known that they must do the same. Once you’re done being a robot and having that conversation hopefully the situation will be resolved. Be prepared for an outcome that you might not like, but time will not be wasted either way and life will go on.