What is a manipulation tactic in relationships that doesn’t get talked about enough?

18 comments

1. Compliment bomb ur partner to get a quickie

2. The slow, insidious guilt.

   The little comments that wear you down and make you give in. Even when you address them in the moment, you’re just being too sensitive. It’s gaslighting, but it’s coercion, but it’s your fault and you should feel guilty. But it doesn’t happen all at once so there’s no red flag to point at.

3. Constantly buying you expensive things or being overly ‘nice’ to the point of suffocation ONLY to keep you from leaving. So you would seem like an unappreciative asshole for saying or doing anything about wanting to leave. A.K.A guilt tripping

4. Constantly criticizing your friends and family, when they know you love them.

5. Love bombing and all that. The super chivalrous bullshit that always get flung back at women when they don’t immediately open their legs for some rando who opened the door for them once.

6. Constantly changing the subject and never answering questions.

7. The silent treatment.

8. When you bring up a valid concern and they talk about how horrible they feel or what a bad person (or similar) they must be so you end up comforting them instead of having your concern addressed. I don’t think it’s always intentional, but some definitely do it deliberately.

9. Guilt tripping. You never really hear about it, it can almost be considered “mild manipulation”, but it’s manipulation nonetheless. I dated this one sleeze-ball who when confronted would say things like “I know I’m not doing good enough, I’m sorry, I’m trying my hardest but I guess I’m just not worth loving” and then nothing about his behavior would change

10. Silent treatment.

11. They can do whatever they want, but if you bring that up, it’s your fault because you are “holding on to the past”.

    Also making you believe that you matter to them and then telling their friends that they don’t care about you.

    Stalking and going through your personal stuff that you wrote when you were emotionally vulnerable and not in your right state of mind, and using that as a reason to paint you as the worse person.
    Eg: Amber Heard showing that video of Johnny Depp abusing two cabinets on the day his mother passed away.

12. [removed]

13. Showing your self as a completely different person behind closed doors. My ex made sure people only saw what he wanted you to see, but once we were alone, his true colors would show. I still have to deal with him because we have a kid together and I constantly have to remind myself when I think he’s doing the right thing or being kind, it’s all for show for others.

14. Being wanted but not welcomed

15. Weaponized incompetence

16. Gaslighting

17. The more “emotional” partner using their emotions to control the situation. I have a hard time believing that anyone doesn’t have control over their tears or anger, and I’m often proved right when their behavior is called out and they immediately stop the tears/anger.

    People think I’m a monster because I can be rather cold/quiet in fights, but its because I am watching the “emotional one” do their thing and am waiting for that to end for a real conversation.

18. Manipulating someone to do something and make them think it was their idea.