I spoke with an older coworker about dating advice the other day and something she told me blew my mind. I asked her how long you should wait until you kiss the 1st time and she said either the 1st or 2nd date. To me kissing seems to be this very sacred act and kissing on the 1st date seems very extreme to me for some reason. Does any1 else feel this way or is it just my inexperience speaking?
28 comments
It is not extreme by any stretch. You do it when it feels right for you, though. There is no number.
I really wouldn’t call it extreme…
That being said, i suppose this comes down to what you consider ‘kissing’ to be.
A quick kiss and tongue tennis are both kissing, but both are on entirely different levels.
Have you grown up quite sheltered?
I think it’s just your inexperience
Tbh I think kissing on a first date is essential, it breaks a lot of tension
Look at it this way. Kissing is just pressing the beginning of your digestive tract to another persons digestive tract.
You do it when you feel like it it’s as simple as that
Depends on how comfortable you are 🤷 I usually just wait for the other person to make the first move lol, I’m just kinda along for the ride. And being demisexual I already think that kissing is big step for me, to me it means trust and vulnerability. (Don’t get me wrong I read my fair share of dark romance novels but it still FEELS big when it happens to me)
For me, kissing is very casual. If I like my date I will usually kiss him randomly on the first date. I like kissing, and think it’s fun and sweet, like holding hands. Not a big deal to me.
Sex is a much bigger deal and I wait a little bit for that.
I find riding on the back of a motorcycle and holding on to a man very intimate, esp if we don’t know each other well.
You get to pick your own comfort zone and you do t have to rationalize it to anyone. May have more to do with how our family of origin conducted themselves
You sound very inexperienced.
I think it depend on what happened before the first date. If you flirted, felt a connection when you talked, the. Kissing on the first or second date would be normal to me.
Intimate? Yes, but extreme? Not at all. Kissing on a first date is wonderful, and sometimes a beautiful way to end the date.
what’s with these comments lol. it’s totally normal to not want to kiss a guy after the first date. i’ve never done so except for maybe once (obviously when the connection was incredible). not weird at all lol theyre still a stranger at that point
I often times will think the person doesn’t like me if we don’t kiss on the first date or hang out but I’m learning otherwise from this post. And I also just really like kissing, and establishing that physical connection.
Look at it this way. It’s not uncommon for people to have contact between their mouth and the other person’s genitalia on the first date.
So no, kissing isn’t really extreme.
No, but then again, I’m Brazilian and kissing is almost like a handshake. But I think the Japanese might agree with you
​
(the problem with anime is that Idk how much is done just for the animation funsies and how much is an actual part of Japanese culture)
The best time for a first kiss is when both people are *so ready* that it feels like a whole new world blossoming when your lips finally touch.
The person I meet wanted to have sex on the beach (technically cliffs) first time we meet. Then again we actually didn’t kiss and haven’t.
I feel the same as you
I would say 90% of all of my first dates have involved kissing. If there is mutual attraction, not kissing would be extreme
I usually only kiss girls I’m going steady with.
Porn ruined ur thinkin if I were to guess . Kissing is called 1st base for a reason fam.
Wait until You are completely comfortable with a developing relationship. That is your right. No one should ever suggest otherwise. Jumping into intimacy with a stranger is a bad idea. People get weird ideas from movies wherein a couple goes from zero to naked within the first 30-60 minutes.
Views of affection can vary. You don’t have to feel the same as everyone else.
Its not extreme but I usually dont kiss on 1st date.
To me, kissing leads to unwanted intimacy. I had my first kiss with my bf at 19, and he only wanted more from there
I wouldn’t say it’s extreme, but I’m personally not usually comfortable making out on the first date. A peck on the cheek hello and goodbye, sure no big deal. That said, during the pandemic I was talking to a dude for like 3 weeks before we met and when we did meet, yeah, there was a lot of kissing lol