He was my best friend and we started falling for each other 6 months ago. We both have never been in love like this ever.
The sex is mind blowing. We are both discovering new preferences and kinks, and are physically absolutely crazy attracted to each other. We are both athletes and very fit.
He adores my body and soft skin- he‘s always had a think for brown skin but I am actually his first non-caucasian which is driving him crazy.
Here’s my problem: As soon as we start foreplay, things get heated really quickly. We kiss passionately and he touches me, fingers me, is all over my body. He breathes heavily and is mentally extremely turned on.
But when I touch him, he is always soft. So, we kind of need to interrupt the heat for me to blow him until he gets hard. I love BJs, don’t get me wrong- but the atmosphere before is passionate, rough, wild. And a BJ with a soft Penis is not.
He gets soft extremely easily, whenever we change positions for example. I can blow him, sit on him and he goes soft immediately.
I know he was very very nervous the first few times we had sex, but it’s gotten better.
I am just wondering if you had tips for us? Is this just the sexlife I will have to get used to? I am constantly anxious he‘s soft again.
Also: when your partner gets soft, does he tell you so and what went wrong? Even if it happens every time?
Never had this happen and am very confused
7 comments
Imagine how he feels, I am in his shoes and I can 100% assure you its some of the most shameful feeling a man can feel. Seriously you feel every bit of manhood leave your body once you start go limp during sex.
A pro tip DO NOT make the comment “It’s OK, we can try again tomorrow” I am not sure this is true for all men, but several others have agreed with me when I have said this before this is a **libido killer deluxe**, it absolutely feeds into our fear of not being perceived as manly, it has been times from that comment alone I have not been able to have sex 1-2 weeks afterwards.
The way you describe yer relationship I can clearly see your both hot and steamy for each other and I am certain he is afraid to fuck up in the sack, so I feel there is a hint of performance anxiety and he is probably afraid that he cant compete with previous guys.
Even tho we know sex is not just about reaching orgasm every single time, counting orgasms as wins, men in particular are quite bad at remembering this, so we start to over think it which in return destroys the entire experience. And often this starts during foreplay. So a chat about these things help a ton to reassure us that sex is about pleasure, fun and intimacy more so than just orgasm.
He cares about you and doesn’t want to let you down, “some guy” couldn’t say it better, It happened to me and I’m working on it.
He’s 42. Just go get some Cialis.
This could be low testosterone issues. It could also be some kind of performance anxiety. The best thing is to be patient and act like it doesn’t bother you at all and that you can’t wait to get him hard again. Pointing it out or commenting on it is going to make it even harder for him. Once it’s in your head that you’ve disappointed your girl, it’s pretty much all over. Even after the fact, if you bring it up, that will make it harder for him in future times. This is one of those situations where you either need to learn to deal with it, be super patient for a while and see if it corrects itself, or possibly have him go see a doctor if this persists for awhile. You can always try something like viagra and see if that helps (assuming it doesn’t get better after some time and patience).
Does he do any cardio workouts? Having a stronger heart could help, assuming there’s nothing else going on.
It probably has nothing to do with you. There might be a medical reason for it, or he just needs a lot of stimulation
Generic Cialis fixed this issue for me. I have a difficult time maintaining an erection without it.