You know when you meet someone and you can feel it in the air you are attracted to them and there’s just this kind of pressure when you are near them?
How do I know if it’s mutual?
Im an attractive female, and I’ve been in instances where people have crushes on me and I’m not interested. So I’m wondering if they feel “tension” and it’s really just a crush….whereas on my end I feel nothing.
How do you tell the difference between having a crush and there being sexual tension? Do men feel tension around an attractive woman in general? Or is it just certain people you automatically have tension with?
I’m mainly looking for a males point of view as I’ve asked female friends and we are confused!
7 comments
There are many physical signals — you can Google — women typically self caress and groom their hair and maintain eye contact with someone they are sexually attracted to.
You can also try moving closer and see if the other person moves backward — intentional invading of personal space.
When it comes to actually feeling it, it has been my experience that some people do feel it and others do not. That goes for both men and women.
Personally, I feel it and can relate to exactly what you are talking about.
One of the best ways I have found to figure out if it is mutual is to casually make contact with them. Just keep it simple. If you’re standing next to them, just gently bump into them. Or if you’re sitting next to each other at a table or something, reach across them to grab the salt or whatever. Or if your friend is standing next to them, go up and talk to your friend and briefly nudge up against them right when you first get there and start talking to your friend.
An even simpler way is to shake their hand. Relax and let the contact linger. If they do the same, in other words if they do not immediately pull their hand back away, then it will be obvious.
You ask them if they’re into you.
Literally this is the answer that will get you a definite reply from the source itself.
You can always misinterpret attraction from someone else who was just feeling friendlier that day.
Don’t waste your time in reading hints or subtle gestures here and there, that’s like reading tea leaves to me; completely useless.
Be direct if you don’t want to waste your time wondering.
This is a great question.
I think it depends on your social skills. I developed those in my 20s and could almost always tell after talking to a girl for a bit if attraction was mutual or one sided. By the time I was 30 I was only making moves on girls that I got good vibes with so very rarely got shot down. Now there were lots of girls I liked and realized it wasn’t mutual, so I didn’t make moves there even if I really wanted them.
I look for signals from girls. How open they are to me, receptiveness to flirting, how much attention they give me. Then I keep flirting until it’s obvious.
Read the book “undercover sex signals”