I(28F) have social anxiety, and I’m already sensitive to rejection. I work retail and have been trying to talk more lately, especially to new hires, and especially when they approach me first. There isn’t anything wrong with the conversations I have with people, they’re normal conversations, and I try to extend it beyond just superficial, boring small talk. I try to get to know people (not in a creepy way). I give people plenty of room to talk about themselves. But one thing I’ve noticed is that pretty much no one wants to come back for more, per se.

People will seem interested in me at first, we talk a few times and have decent conversation, then they establish their friends, and forget about me. We end up not even saying hi to each other before long.

It makes me wonder what is wrong with me every time this happens tbh. I feel like I’m just a generic person to talk to, despite the fact that I try to show interest in people, and ask them good questions. I’m lighthearted, I’m not negative, I’m not fake, or overly nice/agreeable. All I can guess is that there is just nothing particularly captivating about me that makes anyone want to establish any deeper connections for some reason. It is beyond frustrating and I don’t see it getting better.

Anyone else feel this way? Does anyone have another perspective to offer?

2 comments
  1. I completely understand how you feel

    It’s tough when you put effort into conversations and it doesn’t seem to resonate with others

    Don’t worry, the right connections will come your way eventually

    Keep being genuine, and don’t let it discourage you!

  2. Yeah. I have the same problem. I can’t offer any advice because I’m still trying to figure out what to do myself. I hope things work out for you

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