Hi there, I am a 28 year old guy, single and currently have a job, few friends. I live in an indipendent house, near my brothers.

TLDR: Expand my organic social network by increasing social interactions with the goal of meet new people and form long-term relationships.

LONG STORY:
People tell me I am very smart, friendly, cute, and that they feel calm and relaxed after having a conversation with me. (expecially woman)
Beside this, I am not social at all. Infact anything I said, happen at home, family, withing job colleagues, friends.
I always had a particular needs to “learn” something new, and this helped me to gain knowledge, spending time with myself, but at the same time, to lose opportunities for my social life. I must be wrong, but, what if I apply my need to “learn”, to gather social skills, and live a more meaningfull life?
This possibility make me very excited, because I think this is a topic where learning never ends.

Btw, this is the current routine:
23-09 home
09-16 work
16-17 home
5-7pm gym
19-21 home
9-11pm evening outing: usually by bike, by car, in the surrounding area.

Seeing this, you might be telling yourself that the problem is very simple: outside of work at the gym and the evening out I do with my friend, or sometimes alone, I have no other opportunities to have social interactions. I feel very alone sometimes, even if being alone is necessary to re-charge back your batteries, meanwhile, there are times I wish to talk to someone for 24hours straight…
Is the solution really that simple: being in a social group, or do social activities? if so, where to start from?
I have experience with discos, clubs, bars, going out in high places, expensive dinners, etc, and I don’t like the fake atmosphere of these places at all, I feel uncomfortable, although I don’t deny that they are opportunities to meet people…
Rather, I found myself comfortable in circles such as church, school, work, a course of study, where you also did useful things and met good people.
I need places where interaction prolonged and repeated over time, and you can deeply engage with somone… this is why discos and clubs fails, at least for me, while a course of study, a job, work perfectly because it’s where you can make long-term friends, and relatioship!

Among my skills, there is drawing.
Among my interests. there are writing, reading, learning anything. Also nature, and it could sound strange: people. I find actractive when I am in a “good” discussion with someone, since I am introvert and very sensitive.
However, I would also like to overcome my weaknesses such as being shy, introvert by taking part in some courses such as comedy, acting, dance, music.

Furthermore, how do we recognize that the club or activity we have chosen is not for us?

ps: besides the fact I could join a club, I was thinking that maybe I might be able to start a drawing club myself, but I didn’t know where to start..

1 comment
  1. I’m in this same boat and in the past what’s worked for me is do an activity or hobby you enjoy that meets regularly.

    Like an improv class or another class where you interact with people.

Leave a Reply
You May Also Like