I’m pretty sure I’m a lesbian for more context about what happened to me you can check my other post. Basically up until 2 years ago I used to like men but now I seem to only be attracted to women. After this change I publicly changed my style I wore red lipstick and black eyeliner as eyeshadow every day I wore alternative dresses and skirts and would sometimes wear spikes I wore lots of weird crazy clothes. I also feel like my personality changed a lot my mannerisms the way I talk everything. Please help me act straight and stop giving off these vibes. I’ve tried talking about guys to some of my peers but they have said hurtful things to me. I told these girls I had a boyfriend and this girl said you have a girlfriend. Or I get do you have a boyfriend long pause or girlfriend. There are many reasons I need to pass as a straight woman so please help me out guys I need lots of good advice.
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I’m incredibly confused.
So you feel like you’re only attracted to women, and yet you don’t want to give off Les vibes despite feeling this way and doing pretty much the “I’m a former straight girl who has recently discovered I like girls now” starter pack?
The answer is pretty obvious. Stop dressing like an obvious lesbian. There are so many lesbian women who don’t dress like an obvious lesbian or have mainstream fem clothing that they use to blend in and not be outed as one. Invest in some of that clothing or dig it out of your wardrobe and wear it so you can blend in more?
I don’t know what you want us to say. One of the biggest defining factors which decides how someone views another’s sexuality is how they dress.
Why can’t you print as a lesbian? Also if you like girls do you actually have a boyfriend? There’s so much more information required here…
Well, biggest thing is to stop wearing the clothing you wear. It doesn’t sound like you live in an area where that clothing is commonplace on straight women, so unless you move to somewhere where it is, you won’t fit in because of it.
Other stuff you’ll just have to adjust as you go.
Be aware that if you choose to do that you’ll be wearing yourself out by faking it. It’s a sad slow slog to the bottom when it comes to acting like that. I’d consider moving somewhere or at least planning to move somewhere where you can be free with your associations.
It also stands to mention that there is the option of saying fuck it and owning it. My gut tells me that if I was ever gay or not straight and I was persecuted for it I’d tell em to fuck off. You are on the right side of history and you are allowed to be lesbian, don’t ever think that you can’t be because of others. I know that’s easier said than done but it’s the truth, I guess what would you rather, live a lie to protect yourself or live truthfully and force others to accept you?
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Look for outfit and hair inspiration on Pinterest. Use keywords like, “girly”, “feminine”. You can find all types of styles so start from there. Also, consider your hairstyle, too. If you prefer short hair, be mindful of how you style it.
As a male who acts straight and gives off gay vibes
Oh do I have advice for you.
The lifestyle you are asking to live is called DL. Down Low. It simply means you want to mask your orientation for career, social, and economic reasons. People will accept you, But you will be miserable.
I’ll give you both answers.
Answer 1: download Pinterest and save more bright, flirty looks. Search “cute outfits” and millions of female outfits will appear. Go to goodwill or the mall and get 5 affordable tops and 2 skirts, 2 female cut shorts, and leggings. This is your choice! But less black colors more pink, orange, yellow, blue, and red if you’re feeling flirty.
This will work until it doesn’t.
Answer 2: others have said move, I am SCREAMING IT! I moved to NY and felt free for the first time. I could be sl***y and didn’t apologize. The moment I moved back home I got comments like “why are your underwear showing” and I just gave them a bs answer. Fake it. You don’t have to be perfect, but be you! Wear what you want, don’t apologize. Surround yourself with supportive people, and start a new normal.
It’s okay to be alone. You don’t have to be with a crowd who can’t accept you. Nothing is worth wasting your life!
Peace and love, p.s. I stopped listening to others opinions. It set me free, now I’m queer ❤️
If your personality has changed that much in 2 years you should go talk to a psychologist and explain. Depending on your age mental health issues develop earl to mid thirties. One first symptom is a personality change. Just something to think about