oldest child syndrome???

I feel like I have to be perfect all the time, the obedient one, the mature one, the rule follower, etc.
I never really noticed how much of a perfectionist I was with sports/abilities until recently, my coaches and teammates telling me how I’m everyone else’s biggest supporter while I drag myself down.
I never noticed how I feel like I have to be perfect until recently, some of my friends/classmates/acquaintances telling me how much of a rule follower I am. how I should live a little.
Don’t misunderstand this and think I have a serious personality, I don’t, not like 98% of the time at least. I had people tell me that there hasn’t been a time where I wasn’t happy and smiling.
Its really annoying to have the personality that I have, my mom tells me to ask for things that I want to do but in the past has told me not to ask her again and so I can’t get that out of my head. mentally I just feel so serious while on the outside ima bubbly, smiley, fun, slightly annoying/get-schoolwork-done-kid (maybe slightly a goodie 2 shoes because I do enjoy school sometimes) by my Peers; and the girl who is put on a pedestal by most admin/teachers at my school for being a “leader”
I feel conflicted because none of it is who i want to be. i want to take risks, have fun, get shit done and be a leader all at the same time, i domt know how to change my personality!!

there’s this Halloween party I want to go to, my friend invited me and said the host (who I don’t know) told her to invite people. I know its probably a bad idea but I really want to go, I want to live a little but my mom doesn’t think its a good idea. but I want to live, take chances and meet people outside of my school, I mean isn’t high school supposed to be about taking chances?

any tips on like persuading her or changing my own personality to be less mentally serious??