Hey, I am m22 and recently saw a really cute (or atleast im pretty sure shes really cute, since we are both wearing a mask) cashier in a store I reguarly pass by when coming home from work. The thing is I am very inexpirienced with girls since for the most part of my life I had to deal with several mental issues and only recently started to really change my life (try to do more sports, go out more, more social contact). And I really want to ask that girl out, even if she rejects me or she turns out to not be exactly what I am looking for, just so I can get over my insecurities.
Is there any good way to ask her out? I mean, as I said, I am fully expecting to get rejected, but still would like to have the best chances I can get.
My current 2 options I am deciding between is A: Just go in buy something and casually ask her out, the store isnt very busy, but i fear this way she could get a little uncomfortable being confronted while at work.
And B: Leaving her a Note when I buy something, that would pressure her less, but kind of seems very self-conscious?
So yeah, what would you guys say what the best way to do this is?
12 comments
Maybe wait until her shift’s done
Don’t. Women working as cashiers, waiters, and bartenders get hit on all the time, and they hate it.
It’s great that you are taking steps to improving yourself! Just like the other improvements you’ve achieved, initiating and maintaining romantic relationships is also a skill to be learned step-by-step.
Definitely go with option A. Sure, women don’t like to be asked out at work, but when else are you going to ask her out? If guys always wait for the ‘ideal’ time and place to ask a girl out, then no romantic relationships would ever materialize. Don’t just leave a note; asking her out in-person demonstrates confidence and the willingness to step out of your comfort zone, both of which are attractive and would increase your chances of success. If she thinks she might like you, she will figure out a quick way for you to get in contact with her.
Like you said, when you ask this girl out (or any girl), it is very likely that they reject you. **But how will you ever know if you don’t ask?** She might be receptive to your advances, and you might go on to have a great relationship with this person. The important thing if you do get rejected is to respect their decision, and move on. Don’t try to convince them otherwise.
Whatever is the outcome, you will have taken a step forward in growing and improving yourself. If it’s the first time you ask a girl out, you most likely will feel a great deal of stress and/or anxiety before asking her out. That’s very normal, as you are leaving yourself very vulnerable by bearing your emotions and opening yourself up to rejection. **Take a moment to take in your thoughts and feelings, and think about the positive outcomes that will come with you asking her out.**
If she rejects you, learn from the experience, examine what happened, and better yourself for the next time. If she reciprocates, there are probably things to learn from the experience as well, and you can look to improving on the next step of romantic relationships.
I hope this helps. You can DM me if you would like any additional advice or insights.
People don’t choose to be at work and interact with you, they do it because they need the money and it is their job. You should approach girls who are at work.
I would personally take better to a note. Approaching me at work would make me uncomfortable in general so a note with your number and something nice would be better so she’s not pressured.
As a cashier who gets hit on a lot- Don’t do it. We hate having to reject people at work, because it makes us feel awkward having to say no and not knowing what the customer will say or do next. I remember one time at work a much older man was hitting on me asking for my social media, it made me uncomfortable and although I don’t always want to pull the “I have a boyfriend” card, in some instances like this, I had to. He continued pushing and I just gave him an awkward laugh and told him no thank you, (PS. I NEVER try to get salty with customers here, I live in a vacation area and many customers that get angry at us also get extremely aggressive and threaten us). It makes us feel awkward. Instead, you can ask this girl about different hobbies, what she likes, etc. You are MUCH more likely to get her number if she has the same interests as you, it’s a win-win because you find out if you’re actually compatible and you could possibly get her number! Most cashiers know how to talk to people and can strike up a good conversation.
PS. Don’t straight up ask her if she has a boyfriend, it would make her feel like you would respect another man more than a woman if she says no.
I’d go in and say hi. Ask her about something in the store. I’d meet someone before deciding I want to ask them out. Get some sense of their personality. You walk past regularly so can get get a vibe from them after a few interactions. Then decide if you want to ask them out.
Honestly bro just try to start a conversation about something relatable. If y’all vibe maybe ask for her number, if y’all don’t just move on. I wouldn’t just go ask her out without at least getting to talk to her a little bit to see if she’s receptive to you ya know?
Uhh I wouldn’t man. She probably gets asked out every other day by weirdos.
DON’T do the note, IMO. Just try to talk to her if it is NOT busy when you go in. Ask her how her day is going and go from there, see how she reacts. Just a simple “Hello, how is your day going” with a genuine smile.
Or simply say hello.
Be friendly and casual. Do the small talk thing to see if you have interests, websites or people in common.
If she is starting to express more than polite interest, then you might offer her a note with your number and where to find you on social media. Don’t ask for her number, or ask what time her shift ends, either might get her in trouble at work.
rather than asking her out, why not try to make her laugh instead? one thing might lead the other…