Every year my fiancé’s step-grandparents ask us for a Christmas list. I see them MAYBE once a year and I just really don’t want them spending money on me. We don’t usually get them a gift (and in the past the only reason we have is because they’ve gotten us one).
I am getting sick of this holiday where people spend money just to spend money, and I’m left feeling obligated to do the same 😅 I’m pretty minimalistic anyways and if I want something during the year, I get it.
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Well at least they’ve tipped you off that this is coming. Why not ask them for something small in a niche area of interest for you? That could actually help them know you better. Or, pick a favorite food/snack/guilty pleasure that you don’t get for yourself but would really enjoy. Something consumable won’t stick around!
You could do the same for them — find out what they like to eat/drink/snack on and get them something along those lines.
At their age this is something fun for them to do. Why not go with the flow.
In these instances, I always insist that they don’t need to get anything for me and having their company over the holiday is all that is really wanted. If they persist, I ask for candles or gift cards to Dunkin or Starbucks. I aim for something small that can be easily purchased for less than 10-15$.
I’m with you on this. Holiday buying is a JOKE! everything purchased loses half the value the day after Christmas.
Try registering for your wedding when your 39 and own your home!
Here’s what I was told, it’s golden advice. “Tell them something, otherwise you will get crap.”
Figure out something you’d like that costs about $25, and tell them that.
Turn it around on them.
I have begged for years to stop the nonsense. It doesn’t work.
You could try suggesting a gift card from a store that sells practical household items, or you could try suggesting a huge bundle of toilet paper because (unless you have a bidet) that is sure to come in handy eventually. At any rate, dry household goods might also be an option. They could give you a really fancy dressed-up version of 13-bean soup, for instance, or a Christmas ham. They could even give you an “experience” gift, like tickets to some fun local event (ice skating, wine tasting, local concert, etc) or pay for an Air B&B pr hotel so you can plan a visit. Try suggesting that the gift be something that can be appreciated for a short time, rather than something that will sit until it is thrown away.
Accepting gifts is actually a form of kindness. As a parent, I have had to learn how to help people give me gifts because it is a gratifying and joyous experience for them. Gift giving is a social ritual that can be performed without a huge amount of consumerism, and which has definite value.
Ask for their favorite book. Or if you are into records their favorite album.
Ask them to contribute money to humanitarian organizations such as Red Cross or Dr without Borders.
Ask instead of gifts ask they donate to x cause instead.
You could suggest that they make a donation to a charity you support instead of giving you a gift. I’ve done this in the past and suggested that a donation be made to an animal sanctuary for rescued farm animals – it made me feel good, made the gifters feel good, and the sanctuary was very happy I’m sure 🙂