I don’t under what’s going on and I don’t know how to ask either

1 comment

1. You need to ask him. I like to open hard conversations with something positive. You could be honest with him and say something like “we have obvious chemistry and are aligned well on life goals and the kind of (long-term) relationship we were both looking for”, and I really like you.

   You could then try to sit down and directly tell him how you feel. For instance, you could say something along the lines of ” I don’t feel like I’m getting my needs met and don’t really understand what you want either. I had this problem with my ex and he got super angry when I complained that we don’t see each other enough, so I feel discouraged every time I try to script my complaints because our actual dates end up going well every time and I don’t want to start a fight.” After you show that you can be vulnerable and direct, then continue the conversation. You could ask him “how do you really feel about me?”

   He’s a very grown man, if he can’t handle an open conversation about where your relationship is going, then it may be time to explore other options. If one hard topic is going to ruin what you two have, then that tells you a lot. Good luck!