My gf and I have been dating since highschool. Most of the time, has been through long distance which sort of sucked, but I didn’t care since I love her and think it’s worth being with her. However, recently she’s been getting more into her religion (Christianity). As a result, she absolutely hates when I bring up having sex with her, even though we’ve done pretty much everything before except the actual deed. Im a guy and obviously i’m going to desire her. However, she told me shes fed up with me and if I keep desiring her sexually then its better for me to go with other women to have sex. This is what she said “Go have sex with other bitches cuz I aint giving you shit.” It’s the first time she’s ever cussed at me like this so I was a bit shocked. At this point I’m lost on what to do. How do I just end a relationship like this? She’s so beautiful and has been loyal and kind to me throughout these years and I wonder if I’ll ever find someone like her again. I’ve recently rejected a couple of women who were interested in me so I’m confident I’ll be able to attract another beautiful lady like her. However, going through the talking stage and all this other stuff just isn’t for me. Right now I’d like to focus on myself and if I do have contact with girls. I honestly just want sex. I’m 19 and want to enjoy these years having a bit of fun, but am not sure how. Also, how could I get over such a break up after 4 years with this girl?
4 comments
Dude, just break up with her. Relationships shouldn’t be all about religion and not being able to have sex would suck big time. And if she’s telling you to go sleep around, that’s a major red flag. Trust me, I’ve been there before and it never ends well. It may hurt now but focus on yourself and keep things casual for a bit until you’re ready for something serious again.
Damn, that’s tough. Honestly, if she ain’t giving it up and cussing you out like that, maybe it’s for the best to move on. You’re young and gotta enjoy yourself while you can. Don’t stress about finding someone else right away, just focus on yourself and have some fun in the meantime. Breakups suck but time heals all wounds bro.
You need to have a serious conversation with her about where you both see your relationship going. If she says she is open to sex after marriage then you’ll have to ask yourself if you think it’s worth holding off until then, or even if you want to get married to her at all. But with the way she spoke to you initially about it, it was a bit disrespectful and if she carries on making remarks like that you’ll grow to resent her down the line.
And don’t let the whole “I wont find someone else” hold you back. You are so young, you will find someone.
You need to understand that Christian girls are taught that their only value is purity. In her mind, you are trying to take her only value and steal her future by wanting sex. I think if she doesn’t want to have sex she is absolutely right in what she told you, especially since you’ve been harassing her about it.
You don’t love her. If you did, you would HAPPILY respect her boundaries and be more than willing to wait for her to be ready. But you’re not willing to wait patiently and respect her needs. You want to get that pecker wet! That’s fine. Just don’t drag along a girl who isn’t interested in that and is perfectly clear about it.
Also, break up with her before screwing around on her and giving her more hangups surrounding sex and men than her religious upbringing did.
FYI: In 10 years, you are going to facepalm at this post hard.