A few years ago i was extremely extroverted, i used to be in like tons of social groups irl, had a lot of friends and so on. Two years ago i started a startup in college, which failed, and it led to deppresion, anxiety and so much more. Also during this depression period i kind of got out of all the social groups, i was in, stopped talking to a lot of friends and so on. Rgt now i have severe social anxiety issues, and thinking about how i was two years ago, i don’t understand why. I am not in depression any more. I only have friends who are okay with me just keeping in touch like once in a year or something. Rgt now for me friendship is like situation and proximity based. Also i pschoanalyze everyone i meet and my psychoanalysing is better than some psychologist majors that i was with.
I seriously don’t understand whats happening. Also i now only see why people are assholes and why i shouldn’t be bothered by them. I still go out, meet people. But isn’t bothered at all to exchange contacts or anything. Honestly i don’t wanna stay in a friendship or anything.
Sometimes i feel like its an epiphany of sorts on how world is, and at other times i kind of feel like an cold asshole. So how do i be a better person or is this how its supposed to be?
2 comments
Sometimes that feeling like you have a had a sudden epiphany is the result of your brain slowly being exposed to the same thing until it gets to the point where you have to face it head on. It can lead to sudden shifts in behavior because to your body the way you were acting before in response to a problem didn’t work.
In this case it seems like you have high expectations for yourself, and can use your ability to analyse others to get others to like you and validate your strong sense of self you got from the pride you feel in your start up.
You’re still self confident in yourself but you also feel disdain for those around you because it feels like the work you put into your relationship with others and your startup wasnt worth it.
But it does get better! There’s always new opportunities in life 🙂 you’re young and over the course of your life you’ll learn new lessons and your personality will change, sometimes in big ways, to reflect that. That is ok! Just take it easy until you feel like you have enough distance to either feel better or have a better perspective on it, you got this!
There’s nothing wrong with you. You see things at face value and it’s a shock. Many people – many… don’t want to delve that deep. I’m like you – similar situation and it is not easy. Whoever wrote the response is a genius … spot on. I think maybe it time for a new you. A family member of mine had a stroke a few years ago and they felt they were no longer the person they used to be due to brain damage. During therapy – we talked a lot about Neuro plasticity – how the brain can rearrange – change. They recommended picking up new hobbies that work a different side of the brain. Exercise, playing guitar, cooking lessons. Maybe big social activities aren’t for you right now. Do something different for you. To you – peace and love.