I’m currently doing a lot of online dating. I sometimes meet people where I’m not sure about having a relationship with them but who I can imagine as acquaintances or friends.
I’m currently in such a situation. We’ve met twice. It was ok, but we have very different lifestyles, to the extent that I don’t think compromissing would be possible. We kept in touch after the second date but then our contact stopped naturally around a week ago. Our meetings weren’t very intimate, just talking, some conversations about the past relationships, but in a very factual way. No talking about emotions.
I’m not missing him and I think the differences between us were simply too big. At the same time, I liked him as a person and I find it a bit pity that we lost contact. I would love to reach out to him but I’m afraid he will treat it as a sign I’m interested in him romantically. He deleted his account on the portal around a week ago, just after our last conversation. But I don’t think it’s because of another woman, he didn’t seem like a person who dates a lot.
4 comments
> I would love to reach out to him but I’m afraid he will treat it as a sign I’m interested in him romantically.
I’m pretty sure you can use words to avoid this misunderstanding.
I’ve made plenty of platonic connections through dating. Ultimately, dating is just about meeting new people and getting to know them. You can’t reliably predict the kind of connection you’ll develop with a new person.
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I’d reach out to him. If you feel drawn to someone (platonically or romantically) then I believe it’s worth persuing just to see how you could be in each other’s life. You can explain to him what your intentions are.
Meeting people through online dating is awkward and in-organic, so you never know what it could be like if you give yourself the chance to get to know someone. I’ve become good friends with someone I met on online dating (there was never anything romantic between us) and also someone who overlooked initially ended up becoming my husband.
Just talk to him. I moved countries and my 4 closest friends were all guys I went on a date with, one actually dated but realised we weren’t a good fit for each other.
It’s up to him to decide if he can handle this or not.
My ‘dating’ guy disconnected for a month and then returned. We often plan meet-ups or travel together.
But neither have feelings in a romantic extend.