So my (20 f cis lesbian) gf (19 f mtf transgender) is pre-op. Initially I was very taken aback by it because I’ve had really bad experiences in the past with men and penises that make me averse to them. I have come to associate penises with violence, trauma, misogyny, and sexual assault so thinking of touching or putting one in my mouth or vagina (even if it belongs to a woman) fills me with fear and mental discomfort. At the same time, my gf and I are very much in love, so I want to overcome this aversion without giving her dysphoria or appearing transphobic. Any advice?