So I recently started talking to a dude , he’s cute and has the best smile I damn near ever seen but I just can’t open up to him . It’s hard for me to open up in general , but I just feel awkward when I’m talking .
He’s really patient and optimistic but I just don’t want to mess anything up because I’m really comfortable with him and all he wants to do is dig deep into my little brain and I’m just very guarded .
Yeah I have been hurt in the past but I don’t want that to carry over with him so what should I do ? Should I take a shot before or something before talking to him or what . Or should we take it slower ?
3 comments
Take a shot w him it’s not often u can find good guys like that
Stop putting him up on a pedestal. Face your fears and strike up conversations with him. Genuinely connect with people in real life e.g. ask how they are, their hobbies, interests goals, opinions, etc. Listen and pay attention to what they say. Share those things about yourself when asked. People also subconsciously attach you to the value you bring. The value you bring is a clear, unique, and convincing reason why people will interact with you, let alone do so constantly. So Find ways to add value to their lives. Having In person interactions is the easiest way to stand out from countless people who text or message. People remember and favor in person interactions because of the positive vibes. If your hobbies, skills, talents align with their interests or can help them, bring it up and offer to help them. Finally, learn how to be genuinely busy in your life pursuing your goals and hobbies, while interacting with people on the side. People are hardwired to be repulsed by neediness and desperation and instead gravitate towards those who are self confident and well rounded in life. They want to see active confirmation of you actually doing something in your life other than just talking to them. So chase excellence, not people.
Be yourself and stop being scared to open up, being closed off is going to get frustrating for him and at some point you run the risk of possibly losing someone that you truly like. I know it’s not easy being transparent so start with the small stuff then go from there.