I (36f) am married to my husband (40m) and have two kids from a previous marriage. When my first marriage ended, I moved home with my kids and after a few years I started dating a man who completely swept me off my feet. He was amazing in every way. Unfortunately our relationship ended (on good terms) because he was 10 years older than me and ready to settle down and get married. I had just gotten out of an abusive marriage and was not ready to do the marriage thing again yet. We stayed friends and both of us eventually started dating other people and then both ended up marrying other people. It has now been 10 years since we dated. I have been married to my husband for 4 years and he is great. He adores my kids and he’s a hard worker, but we do have our issues. He (46m) is married to his wife who does not like his kids and makes no effort to have any relationship with them. On New Year’s Eve we were both out with our spouses and ran into each other. Something sparked and we have been talking. We are both still so desperately in love with each other it’s literally painful. We want to be together so bad, but we don’t want to hurt our kids and our spouses. He is worried about losing his house and belongings to his wife and I am worried about how devastated my kids will be. Is there a way that we can be together without just completely crushing everything in our lives? My kids are 12 and they might understand, but my husband has become their dad and I feel so selfish ripping them away from him. I’m just not in love with him. He has lied and cheated and we have a lot of issues, but my kids don’t know any of that and they think he literally walks on water. What do we do? What CAN we do? We both made a huge mistake 10 years ago and we don’t want to live the rest of our lives without each other. I need help.