It’s as bad as the title says. My girlfriend is poor, so I help her out a little. I give her $100 a month
to supplement her and her son so they can eat every month. She loaned her co-worker $20which we both agreed she will never get back.
She said her go worker ‘needed it more than her.’ And I am mad about this. I want to give up to be honest, but I love this person and want to help her, but if she can’t help herself then why even try.
She couldn’t even tell me about this without me paying her phone bill first so we could speak.
Should I stop helping her or just accept that my girlfriend will just terrible with money for as long as we are together?
TL;DR! should I let her keep blowing my money so her and her son can eat?
5 comments
Stop helping her. She’s just handing out money that she doesn’t have.
She’s allowing herself to be terrible with money because she knows you’ll step in if things get bad. That’s not fair on you or her son, you might not always be there, you might lose your job, have medical issues, family issues and no longer be able to help and then her safety net will be gone.
In all honestly she needs to sort it out, living on the poverty line is no joke the only way to make it through is to account for every single penny.
You can’t help someone if they aren’t willing to at least try and help themselves.
Personally, I think you are offering her the wrong kind of help.
If your GF is a single mom, and she’s working full time and she can’t afford to feed herself and her son, then she needs a higher paying job. In order to get a higher paying job, usually people need some form of training or education. Often single moms can’t get that training or education because they can’t afford tuition (although there are usually financing options for single parents) or child care.
Rather than handing her money, IMO, you should offer to help with tuition and/or child care.
By handing her money, you are just putting a band-aid on the problem and create this weird kinda-controlling dynamic around how she can spend her money… right down to $20. (Don’t get me wrong – I know why you are upset and I would be too – but if you put it in perspective – would YOU want someone telling you how to spend your money?)
>She couldn’t even tell me about this without me paying her phone bill first so we could speak.
Have you ever met this woman in real life?
Dude: from your post history earlier today:
>I’m talking to a beautiful ex stripper right now and while I don’t want to marry her, I also kinda don’t want to sleep with her. I enjoy challenging her in a different way. I kinda fantasize about being the first guy to turn her down for sex. I haven’t even looked up her fb or instagram. … I know so little about her … I don’t even know if she’s in a relationship
What the actual fuck are you playing at? I don’t think you have ever met her. I think you are being catfished and scammed for money. I bet those photos aren’t even her.